Post # 1
Ok I need to vent quick about something I’m finding some quests/family to be doing that I think is really rude. I have had some of my BMs texting me telling me how much time they are taking off of work for; for my wedding. The thing is they are taking off more time than I am for my own wedding!! Some are taking the week before and the week after! I can’t even get off that much time for my OWN wedding and yet you get all this time. This is my wedding there is no reason anyone needs to take off the whole week before or the whole week after unless it was my FI and I. Telling me you have off the week before my wedding to relax is extremely rude. Telling me your exact days off before and after is rude. I don’t think there is any reason for anyone to take off more time than my FI and I are. Maybe it just bothers me because I would LOVE to take off two weeks for my wedding but I can’t and when I’m getting texts from people saying they have all this time off it upsets me.
Post # 3
Could they be telling you this to let you know when they are available to help? Or to thank you for a reason for them to take a holiday?
Are they having to travel for your wedding?
They aren’t doing this to rub the extra time off in your face, maybe they’re just really excited for the wedding and looking forward both to your wedding and the time off it means they are taking.
I definitely would not call that rude.
Post # 4
um…I think you need to take a breather. Let them enjoy themselves.
Post # 5
I think you’re right- you’re only bothered because you’d like to get more time off from work, and can’t (which sucks). I don’t think it’s rude, they’re telling you because they’re excited about your wedding. A lot of brides on here would be thrilled to have friends & family show that level of enthusiasm. Are a lot of these people traveling for the wedding?
Post # 6
Methinks you might need to review the definition of rude. These people are happily taking time off to celebrate with you not to piss you off.
Post # 7
No none of my guests are traveling. I don’t know I’m just stressing about everything lately since I’m under 3 months now. I’m just overwhelmed lately and would prefer not to get texts from people telling me they took off all these days for my wedding. I don’t know I guess some people are just doing a mini-vacation maybe.
Post # 8
@julies1949: This! Yowza, chill out.
Maybe they have more vacation time saved up, maybe they just wanted to see the sites of the city. Or, help with the wedding. I don’t see any reason, at all for you to be upset.
Post # 9
Yeah…they’re lucky to have jobs that afford them that much vacation time, but it’s not RUDE to use your vacation time…you earn it. I think you’re just feeling a bit jealous becasue you can’t do the same. It’s okay to feel that way, but now you have to reign it in, because those emotions aren’t helpful.
Post # 10
@ljpink: When we got married, lots of people took days off work and made a vacation out of it, and that meant the world to me. I was so glad that people were taking the opportunity to truly enjoy themselves leading up to and on my wedding weekend. It still makes me smile every time someone tells me how much they enjoyed the weekend. Why would it bother you that people are taking time off so they can make the most of your wedding weekend? Or that they are using it as an opportunity to enjoy themselves? Isn’t that what couples hope for? We certainly did.
Post # 11
@ljpink: Hmmm… I don’t think that’s rude. Regardless of what they intend to do with their time, it’s their time. If they are simply telling you in passing, “Hey I got the week before your wedding off, can’t wait!” I wouldn’t percieve that as rubbing your face in it or attempting to make you feel bad that you don’t have the same time. So I say take things at face value.
Post # 12
I’m sorry you are feeling this way but I really don’t think they are trying to rub it in your face. I would say something like….”perfect, then you can start on the seating arrangements!”
Post # 13
- Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World
They aren’t being rude to you. Maybe they wanted to make sure you knew they were available in case you needed their help with something or to make sure you knew they weren’t going to flake out on your wedding. It may be eaiser for them to take more days off in one lump and use it up for vacation purposes than to take more than a couple days off at multiple times throughout the year. I wouldn’t worry about it or think badly of them. They did this for you, after all.
Post # 14
I think you are generally just annoyed that you aren’t able to take time off work which I totally understand. But I would try not to take it out on your friends too much, they are just excited, and frankly, can take time off work whenever they damn well please.
Post # 15
Well, at least you know they will be there and not stuck in traffic, cancelled flights, etc. If there is anything you need before the wedding, I would defintiely ask for help, since they won’t be workign, maybe they can help with last minute errands!
Post # 16
I wish I had your problem, many of our BMs and GMs were able to barely take any time off, which I understood but we had to wing it a bit when it came to the rehersal and such. I find it kinda weird they’d bother telling you about time they have off after the wedding is over, but as far as before goes I’m assuming they’re telling you in case you need some help that week – and it sounds like you very well might since you weren’t able to get a ton of time off.