Post # 1
Is anyone with a small (tiny, if you’re me!) budget worried about the wedding looking cheap, people judging you, etc? I wasn’t really, until I started talking with the DJ about how the flow of the wedding will go and he seemed appalled (and then promptly tried to hide it, as this is a friendor) that we aren’t doing a plated or buffet dinner.
We have a wedding budget of $5,000, give or take. Our parents have definitely helped where they could, but the majority of the money is coming out of our wallets and we REFUSE to go into debt for the wedding, so we’re paying cash. We struggled with what to do before deciding that we would have a late ceremony and a dessert/cocktail reception that we would cater ourselves (I’m starting to regret this decision….) which seriously cut the cost of food. GOAL!! We did all the right things – proper time (later, after dinner), printed “dessert reception following” on the invitations, etc.
But after our friend/DJ’s reaction, I started to worry that: a) I wouldn’t be able to pull this off and b) I wouldn’t be able to pull it off without looking like a giant cheap-o that just shouldn’t have had a wedding. We’ll have plenty of food, don’t get me wrong – and it won’t all be sweets. But we don’t have a caterer, and we don’t have full meals.
I still have a month and a half til my wedding – do I need to suck it up and get someone (with a quickness!) to cater this wedding, even if it’s only small plate, etc? Or do you think I’m just being a big ninny and need to stop worrying about what people are going to think and enjoy my big day? Consider that the invites are out and do say that there will be a dessert reception and it does start later (ceremony starts at 7pm).
Thank you in advance for your thoughts/suggestions!! 🙂
Post # 3
Remember that this is your WEDDING DAY. The people that love you and care about you would show up for NO party. Classy can absolutely be done cheaply. What were you planning to serve? (what types of sweets and what else)
My example is that a $10 container of Sam’s cream puffs becomes elegant and upscale on a silver tray and spinkled with powdered sugar. Trust me when I say, people like to eat. Period. They will love it… Make the tables look elegant and you could stack up McDonald’s burgers. 🙂
Here’s my tip: Use boxes/pedistals/containers under a tablecloth to create intrest on the table. (Cover table with cloth, Arrange the boxes, cover the boxes with 2nd cloth bunched and draped) Anything giving height will be showcased and it also allows more room. Here’s a fairly decent example print. [attachment=358518,45723]
Post # 4
Ok, I wouldn’t call you a “big ninny” but I do think you shouldn’t worry about what other people think. Especially the DJ. I love the idea of dessert and cocktails! I think it’ll be great. But, I wonder if it’ll be hard for you guys to do yourself. I think, if you can, that you may want to mix it up, get somethings from a bakery/caterer and make some yourselves. Either way, don’t worry about the wedding being cheap- it won’t be. Good for you guys, so many people go into debt or spend everything they have (that last one is gonna be us) and then realize it wasn’t exactly necessary.
Post # 5
I think that you should do whatever you want to and not worry about others. Dessert and cocktails is just fine – people will eat earlier. Just be sure you eat a meal before the wedding. Good luck!
Post # 6
It’s TOTALLY OKAY !!!! to do a dessert reception. People are coming to SEE YOU, not eat. Well, I mean, they’ll enjoy the food, but honestly…
My FI is so worried about people judging us (we have a smaller end budget too), and I keep reminding him exactly what I’m telling you:
If they are going to judge you for not spending THOUSANDS of dollars on one party, they are not really worth your time. Seriously, what kind of friend judges someone else for not having enough food at their reception!? Doesn’t sound like a friend worth keeping to me…
You’ve been clear – Dessert Reception. That’s great! Stick with it!!
Post # 7
The people who care for you will understand and go to the wedding because of you. I honestly think these days, it’s great to see people save for the future than their wedding.
But I would try to prepare yourself for some negative comments. Can I ask you what time is your reception? If it’s dinner time, most guests will be hungry and might not be happy with just dessert. So perhaps sandwiches to help fill their tummies up?
Post # 8
The only thing I worry about is that you will be working on your wedding day-who is going to man the desserts?? Otherwise i think it sounds really fun and i would LOVE to go to a wedding like that.
Post # 9
We are on about the same budget. My FI and I are also planning a dessert reception. I am actually really excited about it. Who doesn’t love desserts? I’ve been playing with the idea of hiring a caterer only to serve and restock the desserts and to bring plates and beverages for our guests. The cost of labor from these people is outrageous, though. I’ve got to figure something out without putting my family to work. I think that you’ll be just fine with what you are planning. Don’t worry about that DJ.
Post # 10
Our final budget was $4800 (oops went over budget by $1800!). I worried about things looking cheap because I got plastic cups and plastic plates and so forth but everyone commented to me about how nice everything looked and that I should be a wedding coordinator (yeah right, I’ll never plan another wedding as long as I live!!) Your DJ shouldn’t be that concerned with your food choices IMO. Their job is to help things flow and announce dinner or appetizers or whatever you want to choose.
Personally we did a potluck reception in lieu of gifts. I was a bit nervous about it but our DJ said that the last reception he did was a potluck reception and it was very successful, and he turned out to be right. Whatever you choose to do, it’s your wedding and I can promise you that little things you are worried about now, you’ll see at your wedding are really not a big deal at all. Guests don’t critique your wedding choices like you do or see things like you do, they’re just there to have a good time and help you celebrate.
Post # 11
I understand where you’re coming from since our budget is about $3-4 K. We’re doing a heavy hors-doeurves reception and cash bar. I do worry sometimes that it might come off cheap-ish. But you know what? I’ve never heard anyone say that looking back at their wedding, they wish they had spent MORE- only less.
I think it takes more ingenuity to pull off a smaller-budget wedding than a huge-budget wedding.
Post # 12
Gawd, you guys are great!! Thank you!!!!
You’re all right – it’s our day, and those that love us will be there no matter what.
@flamingred – that’s a major concern for me….. we already have to do all of the setup of tables, decorations, etc, so I was wondering about the food too. The mother of a friend has just started her own catering business on the side, and I was thinking about hiring her just to refill things, properly set things out, etc.
We are definitely doing a mix of homemade (have a lot of people making stuff) and bakery bought, plus fruit, cheese, tea sandwiches, veggie crudite, etc.
@pinkparfait – the ceremony starts at 7pm, so we’re hoping that’s plenty of time for people to get a proper meal beforehand.
You guys are awesome!
Post # 13
I don’t see anything wrong with your original plan. Go for it and stop worrying! Have a happy wedding– that’s all that matters. 🙂
Post # 14
@Querida – You’re right… I think if I create enough visual interest, it’ll come off as less “low budget”. I need to practice creating with those boxes and linens. Thank you for the pic!
Post # 15
Don’t worry about what others think. You will have an awesome day and just enjoy yourselves and others will to:) You can only do what you can do and I think you are sooooooooo smart for not going into debt and paying cash. Stick to your plans and don’t let anyone make you doubt yourselves:)
Hope things with your health are doing alright. I have been praying and believe me I am so feeling you on the whole Heart letting you down part. Hope all is well.
Post # 16
@ACountryCowGirl – Thank you so much! Things are getting better, thank you for thinking of me. I hope you are doing better as well, and that you’re just as excited as I am for all that’s to come. Your date is almost here!!!!!!! 🙂