Post # 1
We are having a small wedding (70 people) about 4.5 hours from our hometown. Many of my girlfriends are not invited since it is mainly for close family and friends. My best friend from nursing school is wanting to throw me a wedding shower and I am unsure as to if I should invite my other girlfriends who are not invited to the wedding. I have been reading ediquette on wedding showers and it states that it a No-No but on destination weddings, some are saying that it is “okay”. Has anyone had this issue before? I am in the same dilema for my bacherlorette party….
Post # 2
I personally would be more inclined to attend a bachelorette party for a wedding I wasn’t invited to than a shower. I don’t find it appropriate to invite someone to give a gift for a party they aren’t invited to.
Post # 3
fayth : No, anyone invited to the shower should also be invited to the wedding. A destination wedding doesn’t change that – it’s just one of those things you “sacrifice” when you chose a small wedding.
Post # 4
No, it’s not cool. You are choosing to have a smaller wedding far away, and one of the things you lose is pre wedding parties with people not invited to the wedding. If people at work choose to throw you a shower knowing they aren’t invited, that’s the one exception I’ve seen. That happened to me, and it was a surprise shower, so there wasn’t much I could do but write really really nice thank you cards.
Post # 5
No one who is not invited to your wedding should be invited to a pre-wedding celebration. Period.
Post # 6
Agree with PP’s. I was just invited to a shower where I was not invited to their destination wedding. Came off as gift-grabby to me.
Post # 7
fayth : The only people saying it’s ok are people who already made this mistake themselves and will feel less embarrassed if they can convince others to do the same thing. Inviting someone to a shower but not the wedding is saying “you’re not important enough to be at the wedding but you’re totally welcome to come adore me and bring me a present beforehand.” Don’t do it. A toaster is not worth your dignity.