- 6 years ago
My fiance and I have completely different views and wishes for how our wedding will be. He has no family except his parents, everyone else is overseas in Europe. He stated that he fell uncomfortable having a “wedding” that is one sided and he wanted something informal and very small. He would love to get married on a beach and have a backyard bbq in his parents yard. I have a lot of family here (we live in Canada). So I dreamed of a more formal and large wedding, I wanted the whole church ceremony and reception. And my extended family really push for large weddings, since we dont get to get together unless for a wedding or funeral.
I’m thinking to compromise both of our ideas, we are having a small wedding on Valentines day 2014 with family and very close friends. In the summer I was planning to have a backyard bbq party and maybe a renewal of love/vows on a nearby beach for anyone who couldn’t make the first wedding. I have to tell you that about half of my family lives out of town and being from our area in Canada poeple might not be able to attend a winter wedding if it snows too much, nor do I want many people traveling on the roads so I assume the family from our citywould be only attending. However I still want to see my extended family so I thought a backyard bbq would be fine.
We are going to invite the adults only for the Valentine’s wedding (so no second cousins and all that) but put in that invitation a little blurb about “if you cannot attend we are having a celebration and renewal of vows at such and such” etc. We will also be sending out invites for this party and telling them everyone can attend (so children and their kids too). Would you think this is appropriate? I am trying to amalgamate both of our ideas of a wedding so we all are happy and get what we want.
FYI: Because of family issues and traveling problems we cannot go away and have a destination wedding. I orginally wanted this but both sides of families said this cannot be done for various reasons and our parents could not attend. And my parents told us that they would pay to have a small ceremony here instead, hence the Valentine’s wedding.
Please let me know your thoughts!