Post # 1
I wanted a smaller wedding around 80 just got fiancess first guest list and its 70 people..ughh my ? is half of them are single men and he wrote mike plus date etc….
we are having a mid morning wedding and brunch so no dancing..(both fiance and i hate the attention on us whole other issue..)
can i invite single people on their own how would i word?
is it wrong? rude? thanks in advance ladies..
Post # 3
Really, if there is no dancing, then I would say that half the point of bringing a date doesn’t exist. It’s not a big deal to sit at a wedding ceremony and then eat a meal without having a date by your side.
So, yes you can invite single people without dates. The unfair thing does seem to be your Fiance letting his friends bring dates, and you not letting yours, so you might want to sit down with him and have a heart-to-heart about what you guys want the size of your wedding to be, and why does he think his friends need to bring dates.
Post # 4
well, if i understand you correctly, your fiance is letting his guests bring dates? if yes, then i think it might be rude if only the people you invite are not allowed. Can you talk to your fiance about not inviting dates on his side too?
Post # 5
Is it local for everyone? Does everyone know other people? Does single mean not in a long-term relationship? Are you drawing the same line for your guests and his guests?
If all yeses, then likely no problems. If some of those are nos, I wouldn’t say it’s rude not to invite them as single (well, it depends – if someone is engaged I do personally think it’s rude), but it depends how much having a small wedding matters for you as compared to making everyone feel comfortable and enjoying themselves at it.
Post # 6
You two need to sit down and discuss the cut off point. It needs to be the same for both sides.
We invited people single, but everyone should know at least 1 other person there. We did if they are engaged or long term relationship the other half is invited, but if they are newly dating then no plus one.
Post # 7
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
It sounds like the two of you are not on the same page about the kind of day you want to have and the number of guests you want at your wedding. I would start with that conversation, and then talk about whether you want 35 strangers attending your wedding when you could have 35 friends and family using those slots instead.
Post # 8
It is totally fine to invite just the guest with no date as long as they aren’t in a relationship. We invited <50 people, and invited the single people without a date (and when they asked to bring one, we said no). We missed that someone had been dating a girl for several months (he lived out of town), so when he asked, we apologized for our mistake and said yes. No one complained – especially when we pointed out it was a small wedding.
I recommend finding out if your FI’s +1’s are actually dating, or just theoretical. You definitely need to be on the same page. Sounds like more importantly you think that it’s an 80-person wedding, and he thinks it’s an 80-each wedding. I’d clear that up quick!
Post # 9
No we are on the same page i think. we both want small but with his career in media its almost a networking thing..people he needs to invite…and he/we assume my number will be tiny as its an 8 hour drive and i have virtually no living family so just a few close friends will make that drive..sucks..
I def knew i had to invite people dating seriously but he works with a lot of young guys who..haha arent in anyway settling down yet and i thought it would be fine to ask them to come solo…just wanted to make sure..
Post # 10
I would invite them on their own. But if they want to bring a guest then its their choice.