(Closed) Small Wedding Woes

posted 6 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
368 posts
Helper bee

She’s being ridiculous. If you don’t want to have a bridal shower, you don’t have to have one! If she wants to share in your joy, she should be gracious and congratulate you instead of trying to shake you down for an invitation.

I’m assuming she is unmarried, based on her rude comments and the fact that you are still in school, so it’s possible she doesn’t understand how planning a guest list works – but you explained it to her already, and she needs to get over it and move on. If she wants to be invited to colleagues’ weddings, then she needs to start acting like an adult.

Post # 5
2965 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Don’t let anyone pressure you into doing what you don’t want to do because if you do, from that point on, it’s going to make you miserable and make you regret it. Write down you and FI’s priorities now and try to stick to them. If budget and a small guest list is your priority, then that’s fine. Do you really think she would invite you to her wedding if it was her planning her small intimate affair?

Post # 6
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Just remind her that it’s an intimate family only wedding ceremony and reception.  She’s being rude. 

Post # 7
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

My ceremony location only allows 25 total at the location. Which worked out like you because we want a small personal wedding!  I ran into this problem as well, I just kept the answer simple..we are keeping it to immediate family and long time friends.  If they ask more about it, tell the truth (half of it) ceremony only allows x number of people…sorry!  I have been using my ceremony number as the excuse for everything 🙂 

To be honest she sounds jealous.  Maybe she has been waiting a long time for a ring or still hasn’t found a relationship that would lead to a ring.  Ignore it, I mean who knows she may not even be in any of your classes when the wedding happens, things change! 

Post # 8
1512 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This is the first of many wedding things you’ll have to stand firm on. People, and I mean everybody, will have an opinion or idea of how things “should” be done. Stick to your plans and just politely tell her you’re really sorry, but it just isn’t happening.

Post # 10
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

This will be the first of many such moments, when someone make you feel awkward because they are being presumptuous and rude. The first few ones are the hardest, while you learn how to handle them, but over time you’ll learn to take a deep breath, smile, and just repeat yourself over and over while they try to crack you so they can snag an invite, or bend you to their vision of how some part of your wedding should be. The most important thing is to take those moments in stride so you don’t let them drag on your happiness. 

Post # 11
828 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It was rude of her to ask if she was invited and it sounds like she’s really catty and possibly jealous. Don’t feel badly about not being able to invite everyone that wants to go to a free party, feel glad about getting your dream venue.

Post # 12
368 posts
Helper bee

@Zalea17:  I don’t think you’re a pushover. Just don’t let anyone make you second-guess what you want 🙂

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