(Closed) So angry at FI! LONG….

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Awww, I’m sorry. : ( I was having kind of a crappy birthday too today.

I’m sure he’ll figure things out; like you said, he’s adjusting & he’s probably stressed in his own way. Maybe when you meet with the deacon you can have him do a little bit of pre-marriage counselling as well as working on the ceremony?

Definitely have your bubble bath & have a good long talk with him later, when you’re ready.

Post # 5
2616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

It could be that he’s anti the spa thing because he doesn’t like the idea of another man (or woman) touching him. I’ve known some guys who feel that way. Have you asked him whether it’s the “couples” part that’s bothering him? Because I’m all for you getting what you want for your birthday, but it’s a lot to ask of someone if it makes them uncomfortable. 

I do agree with you about the karoke party–yuck! And on that note, sorry, but it’s your birthday, not his, so he may like the party, but maybe you can get him to budge on having a quiet dinner out together instead. 

Post # 6
2577 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2010



If I were you I would get a solo massage, either way- you deserve it. Sorry your man is being a bit selfish and insensitive. He will come around I hope.

Post # 7
399 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

If I were you I would go to the day spa without him. Enjoy yourself and relax.

Post # 8
587 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

My bf and I got into a huge fight around my birthday this year as well. I always pick out my own gift and while that used to bother me, I’ve accepted it. This year he didn’t manage to even make a reservation for dinner (until the day of) or even get me a card (he got one the day before, in front of me, which left him zero time to write it) I know that sounds insane but we’ve known each other for 12 years and before we started dating, he would always write me the most beautiful, thoughtful cards and now that we’re dating and practically married, he’s too lazy?! Unacceptable. I threw a fit which ended with him thinking I had lost my mind. I got the best card yet a few days late tho. I know you’re not looking for advice but tell him to get real. It’s your birthday, end of story. Perhaps ask him how he’d like for you to orchestrate what he does on his birthday?

Onto the housework. I relocated for my bf’s job — to Asia. I wasn’t working yet and he was working all the time and was obviously stressed because everything was so different. Despite this, I was sooo lazy about housework it was unreal. Now that I’m working, I cook and clean more than I did before! Something about not working makes you so lazy and unmotivated. It’s almost as though you have soo much time, you can’t motivate to do anything. Don’t be too upset about it. Not working is a lot harder than it seems!! At least for me. I found it very emotionally trying to not have something of my own.

Post # 9
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Olive12:  my fiance is totally anti-massage—man or woman he doesn’t want a stranger touching him–I cannot convince him to go to a spa with me!

Maybe that’s what’s going on

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