Post # 1
So my family is crazy and fights all the time. My mother ruined my surprize and my step-father some what takes her side. Which is fine because that is his wife. What gets me is that he dosent see what that she is always ruining my life. Everyone is very excitied and cant wait for the wedding. My Other Half’s family is awesome and is so sweet. My issue is m so upset and annoyed with my mom (Who never called and said congrats…only via FB…tacky) and my side fighting that I just want to elope. On top of it my side is already telling me what I shoud do and how many people should come. I feel I have no control, even though I told people how it is. (not shy in standing up for myself) I just feel that this process will not be fun and that makes me so sad. Just curious if anyone has been here and what you did to gain control and have fun?? Oh and on top of it we are not enviting certain people from the office and my boss told me once we have too!!!
Post # 3
I am sorry you are having to deal with family issues they are really hard to deal with and I don’t have much help there!
However, your boss has NO right to dictate who you invite to your wedding from your office unless he is paying for your wedding. And I highly doubt that is the case! Go with the all or none option for office co-workers and in this case I would vote for none!
Post # 4
family is tough… very tough. I second Future Mrs. Martin about the boss thing. he does NOT have the right to tell you who to invite to the wedding! some people need to mind there own beeswax!
I would be putting on the diplomatic hat and say stop sharing wedding stuff with your mum. If she cant be happy for you now.. its best to keep her a distance while your planning things. Of course have her come to the wedding, but just make sure you can limit her input. Calm and steady!
Post # 5
Thank you so much guys! As for my mother we are not on speaking terms due to her behavior. My boss treats me like her own child…horrible! I will think about the work thing! never thought of not letting any of them come! the crappy thing is I have been here for 5years and him 10. Great ideas and I do feel better reading this!
Post # 6
First of all congratulations on your engagement. This is an amazing time in our lives,and it (hopefully) only happens onceonce so try you rbest to relax and enjoy it. You are in a really horrible position because family can be difficult, but if I were you I would take a couple of weeks to enjoy being engaged. Don’t plan, and when your boss or family ask you tell them that you are taking a couple of weeks to savour the engagement.
After the two weeks or so, you will feel a bit less emotional about the ruined surprise and less overwhelmed. You will be able to gather your thoughtsand plan the wedding YOU want. Don’t let anyone’s behaviour push you into eloping if you don’t want to. And of course most importantly, stop by WB often for support and encouragement. Best of luck.
Post # 7
Aw… weddings bring out the worst in people, especially family! I’m sorry you are going through this. I do have advice; DON’T LET THEM TAKE CONTROL!
My engagement has been a nightmare. For almost a year, I let my family tell me what was right and wrong and let them make MY wedding about THEM. Saddly, it wasn’t until last month that I realized THIS IS OUR WEDDING! Everyone loves me and my FI but they were making our day about them.
I hate that it took me so long to gain control but better late than never! I just stopped asking for advice, stopped sharing planning and stopped seeing much of our family for now. It’s hard because I am excited but I can turn to my friends and they are excited for us.
Just keep tight-lipped about your plans and invite list. It will be for the better.
Best of luck!!
Post # 8
Honestly, planning a wedding is hard and stressful enough without major family issues complicating things. Being 2 months out I’ve learned a lot, and though my family is wonderful and supportive, I….might have just skipped all of this and eloped to a romantic spot with my fiance.
A wedding is expensive and not that fun in reality.
Sorry if I’m being a bummer, just trying to give it to ya straight.
Post # 9
Sorry its been awhile! Thank you guys so much for the wonderful words and help! Things are looking up and we found a hall lastnight! Everyone is still pouring the ideas on me and my FI family is freaking out if we dont do thinks they like. Sooo I am not telling anyone anything but just show up and it will be a great time! No worries I have it undercontrol. Also, I am soooo overwhelmed and my dumb “friend” is coming that I cant stop crying….for no darn reason!!! Ugh! I cant wait to feel emotionally normal again!