(Closed) So confused and don't know what to do…

posted 5 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
2616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

you can find venues that inexpensive its just some work… how many guests will there be if you invite all the cousins on both sides?

 

does your house have the room for the hundred people

? if someone in the family has a bigger house you can do small cocktail menu and accomadate more people.(costco, sams club or any other grocery store that has catering)

Post # 4
Member
3627 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

If you haven’t sent out STDs or invitations, I think it’s fine to change your original plan. You don’t have to explain your decision to anyone since it’s your wedding and you’re paying for it.

Post # 5
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

it is your day.. your party. period. You have the event you want… at the end of the day.. you’ll be married! 

we wanted a small wedding as well. So we invited our parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles and a few friends… our guest list was  about 50 people…. after everything was said and done… we had a final guest list of 30 people…. and it was awesome.

Now to make everyone else happy we are having a back yard party at our parents homes to celebrate with people who couldnt make it (it was far for most people) and for people we couldnt get in the guest list

Post # 6
Member
3358 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I had a very intimate destination wedding with only immediate family and close friends. I guess I was lucky in the sense that my aunts and uncles are on the other side of the planet from where I am, and my DH’s family is very small and very understanding. It’s possible – it’s just unfortunate that it’s very dependent on how your family feels … and it’s more difficult to have an intimate wedding if you’re going to have it in a very easily accessible location aka everybody wouldn’t have difficulty attending (this was why I opted for a DW).

I can understand the flak you’re getting about not inviting the cousins though. It’s not fair to only invite their parents and not them … but I think a “no children” rule is doable.

Post # 8
Member
2616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@funsizedbee:  ahh okay i dont know how to cut the guest list, our wedding guest list was 278 with only 138 showing up.

Post # 9
Member
3358 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@funsizedbee:  *hugs* the average is $25k so lol I don’t know, I hope that makes you feel a little better?

Post # 10
Member
2403 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@funsizedbee:  How about cutting your food. Have a dessert reception instead or just do passed trays? If you want that laid back feel, you could also serve a buffet of bbq. Dont get too stressed out yet! 

Post # 11
Member
114 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I decided to have an intimate wedding with no more than 50 people. We’re not inviting all my Aunts, Uncles and cousins but instead are having a backyard picnic to celebrate with them. It was difficult to explain why everyone wasn’t invited (even though my little brother invited everyone to his May wedding) but we couldn’t justify spending 15K+ on our wedding when we are trying to save to buy a home.

We invited my godparents so that my parents could each have a sibling there to represent their side of the family. It was a clean break that was easy to explain to others. I also reminded my family that they would outnumber my Fi’s family 20 to 1 if I invited just immediate aunts, uncles and cousins! They were stunned but immediately understood.

I thought long and hard about it but it’s our day and we are getting what we want for the budget we wanted (well almost!). It can be done!

Post # 12
Member
640 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

We are doing our wedding for 15k and I found a million ways to cut the budget, but of course guest list is a crucial one. I have listed some that I have found below:

  • If your Crafty: Make your own centerpieces, favors and decor ( flowers cost of fortune!)
  • have a smaller bridal party ( less bouquets and bouts and less gifts to buy)
  • Have your ceremony and reception at the same place for one fee
  • Book a reception site that allows off site catering ( usually on site catering is much more expensive and if you book a place that allows off site catering you can find much better deals)
  • Book a reception site that provides tables, chairs, linens, dishes and the like so you don’t have to rent
  • DJ’s are usually cheaper than a live band
  • If it isn’t important to you, skip engagement photos and save the dates. ( we did because our photographer is 4 hours away near the wedding site and logistically it didn’t make sense to us and we also had a shorter engagement so the invites were the save the dates)
  • Do your research! Websites like weddingwire.com give you information on hundreds of vendors in your area with reviews from previous brides!
  • Use an online wedding website to get information out instead of paper cards in the invite.

I hope this helps! PM me if you have any other question or want to talk stuff out. 🙂

 

Post # 13
Member
701 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

IMO if you have a large local family it is impossible to have a local intimate wedding  without hurting someone’s feelings. You’ll have to decide what is most important to you between having the wedding you want or having the number of guests you want. Good luck deciding! You have some time luckily.

Post # 15
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I think you should still be ok with a large guest list, but just change the type of wedding you are having. Personally i would have a late ceremony 7:30-8:00pm ish and have a light cocktail reception with beer and wine only afterward. That would save a tonn of money and you could still have everyone there…

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