- 3 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
I’m sitting on Cloud 9 today because I woke up to two emails, which were the Southwest passenger itineraries for my grandfather and my uncle to come to my wedding! This was super exciting to me because I wasn’t sure if they were going to make it or not. Our wedding is in New York where FI and I live. My family is back in Nevada where I’m from, and my grandfather is 97 years old… so I knew there was a good chance that he would not be up for that kind of travel. But he will be there!!!
Then I talked to my mom on the phone… and just listening to her talk about the plans in general and the status of all her little DIY projects that she is doing for me (she’s making my veil and our quilted table runner which will serve as our guest book) makes me so warm and fuzzy inside. Even though we are 3000 miles away and we don’t get to do the wedding stuff together physically, she’s still so plugged in and excited. Everything she is doing for us is so sentimental to me.
Thinking about all of this at once just made me break down and ugly-cry at my desk at work from the overwhelming feeling of relief and happiness… that now officially my whole family and everyone that I love — will really all be there; in the same place at the same time… on the happiest day of my life. I’ve never felt so lucky and so loved!!!
Now I have a legitimate concern: I am going to ugly-cry through my whole wedding. I cry if I think too long about how happy I’m going to feel on my wedding day, and sharing all the little moments with my family and closest friends; I still have yet to recite my vows out loud without crying (I have been practicing this… no success); I can’t listen to our father-daughter dance song without crying; I can’t dance with my dad without loosing it; I cry at weddings in movies. My pictures are going to be awful. Because when I cry (whether happy or sad), I don’t just cry a little bit where the tears delicately roll down my cheeks and it’s beautiful… I’m like a light switch: It’s either all or nothing.
I know that most of this hyper-emotion stems from the fact that I live so far away from my family, and I miss my mom and dad like crazy every day because I only see them once or twice a year. So all the normal feelings that I would have anyway during this time are amplified x10 because it’s emotional for me to just see my famiy in the first place.
Just had to put it all in writing and express myself a little there. Now I’m going to pull it together an make it through the work day!