So… How jealous are you?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Poll *upddated
    I wouldn't like it if my SO went to a strip club : (149 votes)
    20 %
    I wouldn't like it if my SO watched porn : (79 votes)
    10 %
    I wouldn't like it if my SO checked out other women : (125 votes)
    16 %
    I don't care if my SO goes to strip clubs : (98 votes)
    13 %
    I don't care if my SO watches porn : (163 votes)
    22 %
    I don't care if my SO checks out other women : (92 votes)
    12 %
    We go to strip clubs together : (32 votes)
    4 %
    We are swingers : (3 votes)
    0 %
    We have had/plan to have a 3way : (17 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2913 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

    I don’t consider myself to be a jealous person. I don’t care if he watches porn or goes to strip clubs (we have been to strip clubs together). He has always had female friends, and I am fine with that. I might have felt the subtle twinge of jealousy here and there when we were in a long distance relationship, but now that we live together that hasn’t come up. As long as he is showing me how much he cares for me on a regular basis, all is well.

    Post # 4
    Member
    1256 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I don’t mind stripclubs if there is a purpose such as a bachelor party. He would never go on a random Friday. Porn isn’t even a blip on my radar unless its something scary or illegal which would end the relationship. SO has never obviously checked out a woman in front of me so I can’t speak to that but I would find it disrespectful if he did it constantly. It wouldn’t be a jealousy issue. On a scale of 1-10 I probably have jealousy issues at a 2? I am pretty secure with our relationship when it comes to being jealous of anything.

    Post # 5
    Member
    7279 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I maybe get jealous 4x a year if even. I don’t care about female friends, strip clubs, porn or my SO looking at women, hell I point out women for him to look at. But that’s not say occasionally out of blue I don’t get an irrational moment. However, those moments are so few and far in between, that it’s just not predictable. Maybe that’s simply how I am with him. If say I was with someone else, who knows, perhaps I’d be a little more territorial. I can’t imagine that though, I wouldn’t be happy being that type of jealous person. It would make me very uncomfortable in a relationship. I defintely couldn’t put with someone like that either. 

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    846 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I don’t mind strip clubs either if it’s a bachelor party. And we have talked about going to a strip club together simply because I’m a very curious person and I also know that he would like that lol. 

    Porn, I don’t care. Sometimes BF and I will watch porn together actually. So that’s not even an issue to me at all. Now if he was watching porn 24/7, then yeah there would be a major issue. 

    BF has female friends but most of them, if not all, are in serious relationships or married. Now if they were single, it would depend on how they hung out. If they went out to dinner at night, then I would be upset. But if it was hanging out during the day for just a few hours like for lunch or something, then I would be mostly okay with it. Mostly…I’d be lying if I said there wouldn’t be a slight twinge of jealousy but I would deal with it.

    Checking out other women…it would depend on the circumstances. Now if I saw him discreetly doing it, it wouldn’t bother me. Because let’s be honest, if a good-looking man walks by, I might take a look at him. But he would never get a second look. But if a woman walked by and he went “DAYUM! That woman is hot!” Then I’d be like….”Uh…excuse me?!” That kind of thing is so disrespectful. But he never does that, so luckily I don’t have to deal with that happening lol. 

    But overall, I don’t consider myself to be a jealous person. A big part of that is because I trust my BF and I know that he loves me. He would never do anything to hurt me. Plus he loves me so much and makes me feel so cherished. When you feel that kind of love from another person, you know that he would never even look or contemplate being with anyone else! 🙂

    Post # 8
    Member
    594 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Don’t care about him watching porn or going to a strip club for a bachelor party, I’ve done both myself. The only thing I take issue with is maintaining friendships with people you were once sexually or romantically involved with. 

    otherwise, no threesomes and we are definitely NOT swinging. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    1765 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Im not a jealous person at all we both trust one another and respect each other boundaries..he can watch porn go to strip clubs for his buddy’s bachelor’s party no biggie to me. Men are more visual so I cannot control who he looks at but gawking is another thing lol

    Post # 12
    Member
    7279 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @MrsNewBride427:  I can totally understand circumstances in relationship that cause one to feel uncertainity like cheating or pushy ex’s. I’m sure if I had that happen in my relationship I’d be mad woman for a while. I’m more talking irrational people whom, have completley unrealistic expecations. I know some women who get upset their SO if they watch a TV program and he says something about an actress being attractive. Like it turns into WWIII, That to me is over the top and they need to seek mental help. 

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    594 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @MrsNewBride427:  exactly! I have a ton of guy friends I’ve never been involved with romantically so it would be wrong for me to say hey you can’t have female friends. But someone I dated that is another story, clearly lines were crossed that you can’t jump back over. So those “friends” are a no go. I don’t have any insecurities about him being friends with women who are just friends. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    6407 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I answered “don’t like it when” to all 3 scenarios, but he doesn’t actually do those things. I understand some guys do, but one of the reasons I chose him was because of that.

    I am a possessive partner, but also trusting. I am also not technically “jealous” as that implies a fear that he’ll leave or betray me: I know he won’t. I don’t make false accusations or snoop, as he has never given me a reason to doubt him. Women hit on him, he can’t help that, but he does not conceal or encourage it. I am unflaggingly faithful in the same way in return!

    I chose “very jealous” in your poll though, due to my high expectations compared to some bees.

    Post # 15
    Member
    353 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I don’t care if SO looks at or lusts after other girls. I do the same thing! Girls are nice to look at, I get it. I don’t care about porn and I wouldn’t care if he went to a strip club for a bachelor party or something.

    Now when his ex-girlfriends start texting or messaging him, that’s when I get jealous. Because I know at some point they shared strong feelings and were intimate. I don’t act on the jealousy, but SO knows I don’t like when his exes come around and he respects that. Also, if he were to get close to another female that isn’t currently in his life, I’d probably get a little jealous.

    But I trust my SO and I know he would never be unfaithful in any way.

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