(Closed) So I have a question about moissanite…

posted 5 years ago in Rings
  • poll: Is moissanite...
    A unique stone that is a great low-cost option. : (136 votes)
    22 %
    A fake diamond. : (84 votes)
    14 %
    A low-cost way to appear to have a larger diamond. : (125 votes)
    20 %
    One of the above, and you should tell people it's moissanite. : (89 votes)
    14 %
    One of the above, but you shouldn't tell anyone it's moissanite. : (12 votes)
    2 %
    Just a reason to have heated debates on Wedding Bee! : (49 votes)
    8 %
    Mulder and Scully have lived together for years without getting married...so who cares? : (30 votes)
    5 %
    You don't have to tell anyone anything about your ring! : (92 votes)
    15 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    95 posts
    Worker bee

    Please, nobody take this personally! 

    I think that, while there are a few people that chose moissanite for its properties (more brilliance, no blood-mined etc), the majoirity chose it because this way they could afford something that appears to be a bigger diamond than they would have otherwise been able to afford. This is corroborated by the fact that most people decide to pass it off as a diamond. 

    I am not judging people for this: I don’t care what people wear, I don’t care what people claim they wear, as long as they are happy nothing really matters. I am just stating what I think.

    Post # 4
    Member
    7904 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    I think most people choose it for the cost benefits and the other differences they might like are icing on the cake, but I don’t think there is anything wrong with chosing one in order to get a bigger stone. I do, however, think that if you make that decision, you should be comfortable with it, so why would you lie? If you feel compelled to lie, then you are actually uncomfortable with your choice or unhappy with is and then you should reevaluate that situation. There’s no reason to lie. I wouldn’t tell people something white gold or silver is platinum. I don’t think you need to go around directly informing people, but when the topic comes up, I think lying is inappropriate. Besides, maybe you could end up convincing someone else that they want moissanite too.

    Post # 5
    Member
    7312 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    Moulder + Scully = <3 That is all. 🙂

    Post # 7
    Member
    8042 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    I think moissanite can be ALL the things you describe in your post and that’s why it turns into such a heated topic on Wedding Bee lol!

    I believe that moissanite is/was a real stone, but it’s so rare and expensive that the only one you can actually buy is created in a lab.

    I hadn’t heard of moissanite until I came to this site, either.

    I agree that people should be honest about the stone they have. I guess that’s what irks me about moissanite sometimes. I am not a fan of passing ANYTHING off as something else. Whether it be a fake LV or Coach bag (so easy to tell knockoffs, though).. or whether it’s smiling and nodding when a stranger comments on your big, beautiful diamond (which is actually a moissanite). Yeah this is all first world problems, but I am not a fake person and I would not pass something off as something else.

    I like the ladies who are proud of their moissanite and will gladly correct and educate the people who say ‘wow, I love your diamond’ etc.

    People will argue again and again that moissanite is not a diamond simulant. Fair enough.. but why does a prominant seller of asha/moissanite have a URL called betterthandiamond.com if it’s something that is not comparable to a diamond? That irks me a bit. They should leave diamond out of it IMO if they want people to think of it as something other than a stone that mimics a diamond.

    But anyway. In the end I suppose all that matters is that whatever is on your hand makes you happy. I just get irked when people pretend that something is actually something else… and this goes for all areas of life. Fake happy ‘high on life’ people. Knockoff bags. Just a pet peeve of mine. I am who I am and don’t pretend to be anything else.

     

    Post # 8
    Member
    7312 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    @peachacid:  I know, right? “And then we’ll do it doggy style so we can both watch X files”- Bloodhound Gang. Dear The 90s, I miss you.

    /Threadjack

    Post # 9
    Member
    2065 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I’ve got a pretty simple 1ct equiv. moissanite e-ring. I heard about it long before I came to the bee. I wanted one because I didn’t want him to spend over $1K on a ring – I don’t think diamonds are worth what people pay for them because they aren’t rare. I don’t give a shit if someone else only wants a diamond and would only be happy with one, because that’s their preference. It’s really pretty simple: I like white sparkly stones and this was a white sparkly stone that was affordable and has a REALLY cool backstory to it (I call it my space rock, even though yes I know it’s lab created).

    I’ve told all my friends and family what it is. Two of my friends since then have gotten engaged with moissanite rings and couldn’t be happier. But if a random stranger tells me I have a pretty ring, I just say thanks. No need to be the weirdo that starts lecturing a stranger about stones. I don’t feel like I need to wear a sign around my neck that says “IT’S A MOISSANITE” or anything.

    If you want a diamond, rock a diamond. If you want a moissanite, rock a moissanite. Whatever makes you happy – I say you go on with your bad self.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1030 posts
    Bumble bee

    When I was looking for a stone, I wanted a diamond. I wanted a diamond because it was clear and sparkly and that’s what I was looking for in my engagement ring.

    But when I started looking at the prices I couldn’t believe it – the type of ring I wanted was too expensive and my SO would have had to have saved for longer than I would have liked.

    I’ll be honest, the first time I saw moissanite in a thread I thought ‘fake diamond’ and considered it to be more like CZ (which I have in my RHR and it’s just not sparkly enough).

    But then I saw a picture of it next to a diamond and instantly I wanted one. What was the reason why I changed my mind? Because it looked almost identical.

    The fact that it looks similar to diamond was the initial reason why I wanted it. And I’ll be honest, at first I was going to pass it off as a diamond because I didn’t want the ‘ew – fake’ comments to be said about me. But then, the more I learned about it, the more determined I am to tell people what it really is because I’ll be proud of what it is.

    It was found in space (awesome) it sparkles more (awesome) and I got more bang for my buck (awesome). In fact, I think I’ll have to tone down how much I rave about it so I don’t offend my friends who do have diamonds.

    I have seen some stunning diamonds and I would definitely not say no to one of those bad boys! But I’ve also seen some rubbish ones and IMHO the diamonds in my friend’s e-ring don’t even compare to the quality of my moissanite.

    That said, if I had the chance to buy a diamond that was far superior to my moissanite then I’d go for that, too.

    I think it’s all about getting the best quality for your money. Sometimes moissanite is the best choice, and sometimes it isn’t!

    Post # 11
    Member
    5548 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2011

    Until here, I would have assumed any clear stone is a diamond. Unless it is as big as a grapefruit, then I assume it is not.  And I cannot tell the difference between a moissanite and a diamond anyway. And frankly, I don’t care that much. I think everyone needs to get off their high horses (“Well, mine is a real diamond, not some fake simulant” or “Well, I obviously care more about the planet because I didn’t get duped into paying for some dirty blood diamond and got mine perfectly made in the lab”) No. No one cares. If YOU like your ring, I don’t care if it is a ring pop. But at the same time, don’t tell me your cherry ring pop is a 50 carat ruby when it isn’t. If you rock your ring, be it moissanite, a diamond, a piece of glass or sugar, be proud of it. If you are trying to “pass off” your ring as something it isn’t, perhaps you should reevaluate why you care, and what it is that YOU want. Then everyone else can move on with their life and get over this idea that something that is important to them just has to be the same as the important things to everyone else. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    6745 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    You’re missing an option.  I don’t think you SHOULD or SHOULDN’T tell anyone anything about your ring. 

    I think it’s super rude for people to ask about your ring, so I don’t think you should cough up that information.  No one expects you to say it’s a white sapphire and not a diamond.  I don’t understand why the debate is with moissanite specifically.  That being said, I don’t think it’s right or wrong to pass off your moissy as a diamond.  Seriously, WHO CARES?  The only time it’s wrong is when a guy tells a girl he got her a diamond and it’s a moissy instead.  And that’s only because your FI shouldn’t be lying to you. 

    Personally, I intend to get a moissy.  Will I go around announcing it to every one I meet?  No.  That’s ridiculous and I don’t want to sit there and explain what a moissanite is.  Have I already discussed this option with my friends who have diamonds?  Yes.  Will I tell post a pic of my ring on FB?  Probably.  Will I also add a caption that says, “FYI, it’s a moissanite!” No.  Why?  Because it’s no ones business what my ring is made of and how much it may or may not have cost. 

    Honestly, I don’t need anyone to know how much my FI spent on my ring.  It’s a lose-lose situation.  If they find out it’s moissanite, not a diamond and that he didn’t spend a lot, they’ll judge him for not spending a lot – some people might be like, oh wow, what a great idea – but others will probably be like – oh he doesn’t love her, he didn’t spend as much on her, he didn’t buy her a real diamond, it’s so tacky, etc.  If they think it’s a diamond (and from the ring I want, it would be a $30k ring), they’ll say – what wow a waste of money or that’s so gaudy or whatever the case may be.  But, I DON’T CARE.  It’s my choice, my decision, it’s what I want.  Personally, I like the moissanite better than diamonds for a multitude of reasons that I’m not going to list here because they’ve been rehashed on this site a million times. 

    So while I never judge someone for getting a moissy or a diamond – because to each, his own and I wouldn’t judge someone for getting another gemstone either – I also don’t think that I should have to tell people what my stone is made of just because they’re likely to assume that it is a diamond.  No one is getting hurt by them assuming it’s a diamond and me not correcting them.  It’s not like someone is selling my FI a moissy, telling him it’s a diamond, and charging him more for it.  THAT’S when it’s NOT ok to clarify what stone you’re buying!

    Post # 13
    Member
    6745 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    And to add – for all the people who say that moissanites are lab created and think that’s a NEGATIVE thing – would you EVER tell a child created through IVF that they’re not a REAL CHILD because they’re LAB CREATED?  I mean, seriously, the only difference is that scientists have figured out a way to recreate the environment in which that stone is created.  How is it any less “real” of a stone just because it was created in a lab??

    Post # 16
    Member
    11753 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I don’t think anyone needs to tell anyone about their stone. If I had a moissy and someone asked me if it was a diamond I’d say no because I’d be comfortable with the choice we made in the stone. However, I don’t think people with moissy have to go out of their way to tell people it’s a moissy – if people assume it’s a diamond, let them. I don’t go out of my way to tell people mine’s a diamond, and no one has ever asked me other wise. I don’t really think it’s anyone’s business what’s on my finger. If they like the way it looks great tell me, if they don’t say nothing.

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