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So, let me make sure I understand correctly. He got a ring. You know he has the ring, but he hasn't asked you yet?
HAHA I'm sort of in the same boat too. My SO told me that it was going to happen VERY soon and to expect to be married in a year. I got so excited that I told my parents and my friends from work. Still today, they're like "where's the ring"?
i hate it
I would bet he is waiting to try to throw you off the 'scent of the trail'. I sort of did the same thing, but in actuality, I was totally surprised and it happened way before I expected it. I didn't know it was happening at all.
I kinda did this too...still waiting for my ring. Difference is I know he bought mine in AUGUST...like seriously what's the hold up?!!
It just kinda sucks now, cuz if he does anything super romantic or out of his character, Im going to totally expect a proposal and not be suprised
If anything, I totally ruined the enjoyment for me.
Arrrgggh!! I wouldn't be able to patient like ya'll have been. I would like, "WHERE"S THE RING!" I would totally pull a Charlotte--when she is yelling at Harry. I would go nuts.
Wendy- that's exactly the problem! He isn't usually romantic and so when he does make gestures I get overly excited or I become suspicious.
It is just frustrating, and I really feel like I've ruined it for myself...
Agh! This is the very reason I joined this board!
I started telling people right after Mr. MidwestGroom took me to get my ring finger sized... more than two months ago. Since then it seems all anyone wants to talk to me about is where "the bling" is, so I've tried to steer clear of wedding talk.
We're planning a wedding for Labor Day weekend of THIS year, and we've gotten so much done already. I'm ecstatic! But I have no one to share the excitement with me because I've gotten so bitter about the waiting. It's making me so sad because this really is such a happy time.
Also, we need to be sending out our save-the-dates (the venue is booked and paid for) ASAP, but since we're not engaged... ??
awww - try not to stress about it! it's coming soon i'm sure!
@ midwestbride - I'm pretty sure you're engaged :) You might not have a ring, but you've got a wedding planned, which is awesome! I would just announce your engagement and say the ring is on its way (if it is - no need for a ring at all), you deserve to share your excitement with everyone, it's half the fun!
well i kinda got stuck in that limbo! I chose all parts of my engagement ring and it was custom made. . .and the deal was that since I was all up in the ring I wouldn't be all up in the proposal -- and it would be a surprise. . . So while I was excited about the ring -- now I didn't know when it was coming. . .
But be paitent ladies b/c it could be that trip to walmart and instead it happens. At least that's my story. LOL. That's where I though we were going.
But maybe some communication is in order -- I'm sure your SO has his own views on the situation -- is he helping you spread the word? What is he saying about your predicament -- maybe that could give you an idea about how to proceed -- feeling bitter is so not a good thing . . .
My FI was even helping me tell people, also he let it spill that the reason I was still waiting is b/c he wanted to surprise me & also talk to me Dad in person. . .
Ok you definitely need to STOP talking about it with your friends/family. How would he feel knowing you are spreading it around before he even asked? Does he know? Maybe that's why he hasn't asked you yet. Believe me, guys take this very seriously. My fiance and I talked months and months about getting engaged and it got to the point where he would have to tell me before a big holiday or date that no I'm not proposing so I wouldn't get my hopes up. He really wanted it to be special but felt like my talking about it ALLLL the time was ruining it.
Just take a break from wedding, he has the ring so you know it's going to happen. Just stop talking about it and let it alone and I promise, he will do it and he will totally surprise you. My fiance had everyone involved and even told me it wasn't happening and orchestrated this big proposal and I had no idea. It was great!
Relax, it will happen! Hang in there, sweetie!! *hugs*
@mrsmurraytobe- he does know that I'm talking about it with friends. We went on vaca with my parents at the end of December/beginning of January when he asked for their (namely my father) permission. We all went out to dinner after and toasted our future together. He doesn't say much about me talking to my friends, he actually talks to our mutual friends about it too. So I don't think I'm the only one guilty here. I think it's more of a we're already talking about it so it feels real already kind of thing. He does want the actual proposal to be on his terms, which I am completely fine with. However, he hasn't always been romantically inclined, so I think I will know what's up before it even happens. Unless of course, he catches me completely off-guard, which I am hoping is the case.
Yeah when I knew FI was in the process of buying the ring I mostly kept it to myself. There were a couple friends I blabbed to, but even to them I didn't tell all teh facts like I knew he was buying it - I phrased it more like I 'hoped' he would buy it soon, but had no idea what was happening. I knew they would tell other people (gossip), so my plan worked perfectly, people talked about it behind my back but never to my face since I didn't 'know' if it was happening. So I didn't have to deal with people asking 'where is the bling?'
You know, for like 2 years FH and I talked about getting engaged. And he said, "oh yeah, it'll be soon" so when people started asking I started saying "well he said soon". So a year later when I still didn't have a ring I felt so foolish! Thankfully everyone seemed to drop it after a while and were still super excited to hear the news when it finally happened :)
Awww... Hopefully he'll be giving you a ring soon. *crossing fingers for you*
@vanilla - you should completely spill the beans to him. be totally cute about it. "I was so excited about our trip that I was a total blabbermouth!" and hug him around his neck or something. be as adorable as possible. then quit talking about it! he should find it very endearing and probably pop the question soon :-)
I totally know where all you girls are coming from! Once I found the receipts to my ring (1 month ago...which he bought 2 months ago) I have been blabbing to everyone and now I'm just like "where is the ring??" but I can't say anything to him because he doesn't know I know he has it. =(
Ahh! It feels oddly nice knowing that I'm not alone. My mom blabbed to me in early January that my bf asked for the ring from my parents while we were home for Christmas (I want my grandmother's ring). The minute I found out I freaked & called my best friend. Although I didn't tell everyone, I felt as if it was ruined in some way. I started looking at venues, dresses online, etc.
My parents are visiting us in 2 weeks and bringing the ring with them. Then it will be a wait to see how long he will take to propose...I know i'm going to be thinking what's the hold up! hahaha
I'm glad that I'm not the only one in this boat.
I feel some empathy for what you're going through. I knew that our wedding was going to be in July or August of 2010 at least a year and a half before FI proposed, and it was very hard for me not to tell anyone, but I kept silent because I wanted so badly to be able to make a formal announcement that would be met with excitement after the proposal. I was never exactly "waiting" for a proposal during that time, since I knew it wouldn't make any sense to be planning a wedding while I was still in grad school and living on the other side of the country from him, so I guess that made it easier for me to keep my mouth shut, since I knew it would be a while before the formal engagement could take place. I did end up letting it slip early to just one or two very close friends, and I wish I hadn't done even that - though one of them did ask me pretty directly, since apparently she wanted to get it on her calendar years in advance!
Try acting coy with your friends and family for a while, telling them "Who knows, we'll see" with a little half-knowing smile when they ask when you'll be engaged. Maybe that can help build the excitement again.
@mountain.bride thanks so much for your response. it was just what i needed, and it made me smile as soon as i saw it.
my boyfriend knows i've told people. the center diamond for my ring came from a ring of my mothers, and she obviously had to hear we were getting engaged before she gave him her ring. i've told the girls who will be in my bridal party, as well as telling them not to pester my boyfriend (they're probably as excited as i am). and i've told some girls at work just because it's a small company an hour away, and they won't be invited, nor have they met my boyfriend. and it's mainly these people at work who keep asking to see my hand to see if i have a ring yet- that's where i went wrong. =/
so, my advice? IF you have to tell anyone, tell a family member who won't be spreading the news to coworkers and friends.
oh- i'm... engaged. as of a few hours ago! omg!!! if anything was not right before, it is now. hang in there, all you ladies in waiting! 
Since valentines day, it has been so hard for me not to think about engagement. When I had a little too much to drink on valentines day i was in the shower and i told my BF, in all honesty, I felt a slight feeling that you were going to propose. He tells me, i was going to but with school and work, time just flew by and i wasnt able to get things done on time. who knew it would take 3 weeks to get a ring? i was like hello, i told you this a while back.
Anyway, it has now been almost a week and now i can't stop thinking about it or mentioning something. I hate it. I feel like it's consumed my mind. The day after vday, he sits me down and tell me to show him exactly what I want.... I dont want to ruin my engagement, how can I stop thinking about it?
What makes is worse is that his friend who works at Zales is constantly calling him for God knows what and it's killing me! Help!!!!!
FI and I designed my ring together so I knew it was in process. But when I get excited I can't keep my mouth shut, I told all of my close family and friends. When he finally proposed every one was still excited for us. My family and our friends had a cake for us the next day.
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So when Mr. Frosting bought my ring right before Christmas, i got so excited that I literally blabbermouthed to everyone that was somewhat important in my life. I told EVERYONE. I started making plans and talking to people about venues. Now it's been about 6 weeks... and we're still not engaged. I have been so busy with my new job the past few days that I forgot until my girlfriend asked me today if i was engaged yet... Now I realize that I completely ruined it for myself by telling everyone already. It's expected and we're still not engaged...