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aww Im sorry to hear. That sucks. Chin up tho. You can pull through... maybe vegas isnt the be all and end all? just a little dissapointing.
Can you do something maybe in town that would be fun? When I started planning I wanted to do a destination bachelorette, but only five people would have been able to afford/take time off work/etc. So instead my MOH and I planned a fun night in town and I have about 10-12 people coming. I'm not that bitter about not being able to go to Vegas since I just want to spend time with everyone before the wedding.
Also, not to be mean, but you can't be totally sure what he work schedule is unless you are your FSIL's boss. Maybe she stays late to make up the hours or works earlier in the day. It doesn't seem like something you should get involved in. If she says she can't make it because of work then she can't make it because of work. Enjoy the other people that will celebrate with you and have a good time!
My girls didn't even give me a bachelorette to-do. One was utterly broke and the other didn't plan anything. I wouldn't have had a shower if it hadn't been for my MIL (I know, not proper etiquette) inviting over her neighbor, my SIL, my mom, and me. I'm sorry your plans aren't going like you wish they would, but you are going to have a great time with your girls whichever night you are able to go!
If it helps any, my FI had the same problem with his groomsmen and his destination bachelor weekend. At first, all the guys were very enthusiastic about it. But when the time came to buy plane tickets and hotels, all the guys dropped out like flies. I think they were truly excited, but the financial commitment was just too great. Bridal party members spend a great deal to be part of our wedding day, and brides and grooms have to be sensitive to that, even though we all know how much we shell out for the wedding!
Is it just your FSIL that is bailing? Or are the other girls bailing out on your bachelorette too? If so, I would try to plan something more local and see if that improves your attendance rate. Remember that the bachelorette party is such a tiny part of your wedding, so its ok if it doesn't go exactly as planned.
I agree with Twinkle Toes, when it comes down to actually spending the $ people disappear into thin air. The idea of it sounds amazing, but when you have to actually pull out your wallet it's not so fun anymore. Don't be dissappointed about not going to Vegas, really it would have been fun but it's just SO expensive and such a burden on most people. The only destination bachelor/bachelorette parties that are 'doable' are extremely cheap locations with cheap lodgings or when everyone is loaded. FI did New Orleans and the guys all piled into cheap hotel rooms and barely spent any $ while they were there. My ladies came up to NYC for 1 night of fun and I paid for the limo since they had to pay for dinner. You have to do what works for everyone!
I'm with moderndaisy. I think it is a lot to ask of people to take off work and go to Vegas.
I'm sorry you're down right now :(
But keep in mind that it's asking a lot of people to take time off work and spend money on a mini vacation when they have to also attend the wedding, buy the dres, shoes, etc. Even when they are your closest friends. It's hard to judge other's money situations even when you think you know what's gong on. Even for my sister's wedding, who is my best friend, I would have a difficult time forking over money for a Vegas b'ette party, even if I'd known about it for two years. It just all adds up, especially when the b'ette party is mainly about spending time with your friends. It doesn't need to be fancy.
I live in SD however i just moved here. All my girls live 3 hrs away from Vegas so we were just going to drive. We booked a hotel room for 25 bucks a night. I got a awesome deal in my email. There has just been probs with [ppp;;;;;;;;my FSIL shes always been jealous and trying to compete with me so this is just one of her many things to screw up my wedding plans.
I live in SD however i just moved here. All my girls live 3 hrs away from Vegas so we were just going to drive. We booked a hotel room for 25 bucks a night. I got a awesome deal in my email. There has just been probs with [ppp;;;;;;;;my FSIL shes always been jealous and trying to compete with me so this is just one of her many things to screw up my wedding plans.
I know it is stressful, but if your FSIL is jealous and always trying to screw up your wedding plans, be glad she's not going! You will probably have a better time without her anyway. I would also minimize her contributions to your wedding as much as possible. You don't need someone like that bringing you down.
Thanks Angela. When i 1st got engaged she wasn't like this but it seems after she started having kids everyone rolled out the red carpet for her so then she started acting like a princess. Sometimes i wish i was never engaged so long ago i wouldve never asked for her to be my BM if i knew years down the line she would be like this.
Is your FSIL the only person backing out at this point? If so, then let her back out! It sounds as if she's trying to make things convenient for her. Since they aren't, let her do what she needs to do and have fun with your girls! You confirmed dates, gave her plenty of notice, and not all of your bridesmaids HAVE to be at your bachelorette party! I had 7 BMs, and only 4 could come. With busy schedules and 7 to contend with, we went with the date that worked for most people.
Now, if all of your other friends are starting to flake out, I'm really sorry! I know it's not ideal, but maybe you could go to their town to hang out for the night? I know they should be coming to you b/c you're the bride, but it's definitely more fun when most of your friends can make it.
I'd just continue with your plans and let her drop out. If everyone is dropping out then just have a local party and maybe you can do the Vegas thing as a girls weekend out after the wedding.
Oh no, it sucks when people don't come through! I agree with the others that say just let her not attend... remember, it's not about who's not there, it's about those that are! I'm sure you won't even miss her. :)
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So ive been engaged for 3 1/2 years it will be almost 4 by the time we get married. Everyone knew about this wedding for years.
My MOH and I went over bachelorette party dates and decided on one. So my FSIL/BM then tells my moh that she cant take off those dates because she is already taking off for the wedding...
1. She has Sun-Mon off and my wedding is on a Sunday.... She gets off work at 3 on Sat... please explain why your taking days off (LIE)
2. Everytime i talk to her she is off work... some excuse or shes going to Disneyland.. sometimes i wonder if she really works anymore or if shes lying to everyone...
3. We have planned Vegas since forever... she was all for it and she had THE NERVE to ask my MOH to go to Vegas on Sun and Monday so it works her schedual... UHM NO JUST BECAUSE MY FMIL ROLLS THE RED CARPET OUT FOR YOU IT WILL NNNNNNNOTTTTTTTT HAPPEN WITH ME.
I dont want to sound like a bridezilla but now everyone just seems to bail. Ive been planning for so long and everyone acts like they are cool about things but i have flakey friends and now its becoming a big mess. Just seems like one thing after another.
I dont have a ton of friends i only have a few so its not like having a few people out will be no big deal.. it will because theres not that many.
Fiance is doing his Bachelor party the Friday before our Sunday wedding so im thinking i guess i can do mine the same day. Then i have no excuse for everyone to say anything... Guess i wont go to Vegas :(