Post # 1
Hello again pretty bees!
This is my second thread here. I wrote once before about how I told my boyfriend to shut it up about marriage until he was ready to propose. We have been together over a year, and I am in no rush but I do want to marry this man. I felt like he was telling me things that I wanted to hear because no timeline was ever mentioned, and he refused to give me one. In that thread I talked about how my boyfriend was eager to get married and have kids, but it seems like he wanted to have a child more than go through the actual steps of commiting. Also, my boyfriend is divorced and I have never married.
Since I have posted in that thread, things have been good between him and I. We’ve had a really big stupid fight since then, but we have gotten over it. The other day he came to me and expressed that he was down because friends of his keep asking him why isn’t he a father yet (he is is mid twenties and so am I). He told me he was worried that he can’t have kids and that he would like to be married to me right now and starting a family with me right now. He also told me that yes he knows it’s up to him to propose and he is the only thing holding himself back. I didn’t ask him to elaborate.
Last night we were talking and he said that when (not “if” lol) his favorite team goes to the finals next year, I should go with him. I told him no and he should take that trip with his brother (who also loves the team) because his brother would appreciate it more, and me and his SIL can stay here and have a girls weekend or something. When I said no, his reaction was “You’ll be my wife at that time, so you have to go with me.” And then I said to him, “we’re not married, so how is that?” I can’t describe the look he had on his face after that, but he was like “okay, I’ll remember that.”
The conversation was dropped from there, but he did say again that night that he is going to marry me. I haven’t seen any evidence of a ring in the house and any other odd pre engaged behaviors. Last Sunday he was being cute and referring me as his “wife” but I just laughed it off. Once again, I am very frustrated because he has not proposed and to be honest girls I don’t know if he actually will anytime soon. We are both hella busy with school and money is tight, plue it sometimes feels like teasing when he does that.
Post # 3
@busybeebee: Welcome to the Hive!
There are a lot of great things about reading your post here. You have a man who loves you, who wants to marry you, and the timing seems to be right in his life as far as him wanting to settle down.
There are the holidays that are coming up, and many opportunities before the finals in July. Just keep thinking positive thoughts!
PS who is his favorite team? haha I LOVE the heat, I’m a florida girl….they are def going to the finals unless its a different team and they don’t go to the finals are you prepared for that if he doesn’t propose because of that?
Post # 4
Why not sit down with him and actually talk about timelines instead of hints, teasing and un-serious conversations?
Post # 5
He’s an LA fan… but idk about their prospects. I’m into football, not b ball! I was thinking maybe the holidays? My parents are flying down and he also told me he’s already planned how he wants to spend New Years, but he didn’t tell me what those plans were. He only said that they were with me. My man can be kinda sorta vauge at times. I don’t want to be disappointed come X Mas or New Years…
I don’t think that he won’t propose if LA doesn’t go. I think he’d do it if it really wanted to regardless if they go or not. My thing is, I just feel like until I see the proposal in action, maybe that’s why I’m having a hard time thinking he’s actually planning one. I hear the hints from him, but I guess I’m looking for clues also lol
Post # 6
DH and I started planning our May 2013 wedding in December 2012! So as long as you’re not planning on an engagement more than 6 months, the timeline works!
I hope he’s serious and he does it soon!
Post # 7
@veryberry13: Well, I wouldn’t say definitely now. With D Rose back this year, I’d say that there’s a pretty good chance of Miami being knocked out before the finals. 🙂
Post # 8
@busybeebee: haha as long Kobe stays healthy yes the lakers always have a chance. I was mostly teasing but it IS good to know that there could be a proposal even without this being a factor. I know all about not getting your hopes up–but New Years does sound promising. If he wants to do something but he’s not keeping you in the loop of the logistics, it could be because he is planning something! I would just say try to focus on other things to not get your hopes up so it stays a happy surprise when it happens and not a dissapointment if it happens say, the first week of January instead of New Years.
@Irish Terrier: haha yeah, I know I know and the bulls looked GREAT last year without rose (hello NOAH!) You just never know lol!
Post # 9
I’ve tried to discuss a timeline with him before, and he kind of refused. He was pretty much unresponsive. I was actually shocked to hear him say around Finals. I’m unsure about how go about trying to do that again.
I hope that he’s serious too. I’ve thought about maybe a short engagement is what he wants, but I have been trying to limit myself from thinking about what he said. But I can’t
I agree with the focusing on other things. He’s stays in my ear about marriage though. In the other thread, I mentioned how I confronted him about doing that and he told me that most woment are happy hear their partner is so enthusiastic about wanting to be married. And don’t get me started on Kobe, that’s his icon!