Post # 1
And she said the reason why she’s mad at me is because 2 months ago, I told her that I was upset because she spilled the beans to my Grandpa about the wedding, after she told me she wouldn’t. My FH wanted to talk to him first, since he talked to all of the men in my family. So after she told him, my gpa called me and went off on me saying that i’m probably pregnant and marriage is the end of my life. So she’s mad at me because I got upset over that.
She said that she washed her hands of me, and that she no longer wants to be involved in my life. She said I’ve changed, I asked how, and she said “I can’t explain it to you. Maybe you’ll find out in a year or so, but I just know that you’ve changed.” Ooookay..that makes sense *rolls eyes*. We’ve never had much of a relationship, so I guess this was bound to happen. I know I have a long time until the wedding, but I doubt she’ll get an invitation. She said she could care less if I was getting married. She’s done.
She also called me tacky for getting my stereo from her house and dropping off her’s. I didn’t hook her’s up because she doesn’t listen to it and my stereo’s remote was corroded from battery acid, which means she probably didn’t use it. She called me rude and disrespectful too. And she accused me of stealing her cd’s – there were no cd’s in my stereo when I picked it up, so I stole some cd’s that I don’t even have. Nice.
We go from being close for a couple months, to not speaking for months or even a year. She raised me by herself, but my dad has been around too. I think there’s something else going on with her, but I told her I can’t fix anything if she doesn’t tell me what’s up. She said I’ll figure it out in a year or so – this makes no sense to me. I want her to be involved, but if she doesn’t want to, I can’t force it. Idk what to do anymore.
Post # 3
I am truly sorry for all you brides dealing with moms with behavior/mental health problems.
As your poll suggests, you have time. Let it go and see what happens. It’s pretty hard not to invite yout Mom to your wedding.
Post # 4
Such drama. Why do people have to behave like this? I see that you aren’t marrying until 2012, so you have time. Hopefully, your relationship can be resolved by then.
Post # 5
@julies1949: lol @ behavior/mental health problems. I swear her problem should just be classified as prime evil.
@melisslp: Yeah, I hope so. I’m so sick of fighting with her. We’ve never been close, but I’m like geesh! Is it that serious? I’m her only child, so it’s not like she has other kids to run to.
Post # 6
As others have said, obviously waiting it out is the CURRENT answer. However, my initial gut reaction was “No.” I wouldn’t. FI’s mom probably won’t be coming to ours for some very similar reasons (plus a few others, but mental instability and run-ins with some not good things are the main issues). It’s okay to not want to deal with that on your wedding day. It doesn’t make you a bad person. But for now…wait it out. Revisit this question when invites are going out, and good luck with all that you’re going through with this. 🙂
Post # 7
I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this. Just a little different perspective though: She was excited to tell her father that you are getting married. She probably didn’t know you wanted to tell him first?
ETA I see you told her not to tell. I guess she will have to get over herself if she wants to see you married.
Post # 8
@Just_Squeeze: I told her not to tell him so that FH could talk to him first, and she said she wouldn’t. I don’t think she was excited because she told him a bunch of crap, and so he got all pissed off at me. I don’t know what was said since I wasn’t there, but my grandpa told me the next day that they are all dissapointed in me and hoped that I would do better things with my life. He said marriage is the end of the road.
@AmeliaBedelia: My decision is a no for now lol, but I will wait it out for a minute. I really don’t want her to come, but it’s that whole “she’s still your mother” thing that’s hanging over my head.
I’m going to need all of the luck that I can get lol