(Closed) so upset about my hair .. how to deal with my BM/BF/stylist

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Ouch. I feel your pain, I’ve been butchered by many a hairdresser but never one I’ve been friends with – I’ve been able to leave the store, cry and then hate them from afar! LOL

I know how difficult a bad hair cut can be and to be so close to your wedding I can understand how you’d be shattered. Personally I think I’d be seeking advice from another hairdresser – hopefully you can find someone you trust to give you some ideas of what you can do with you’re new hair.

Regarding your friend you have to decide if you can a) over look the dodgey haircut and b) overlook her repsonse to your concerns about the dodgey hair cut and the fact that she’s not really taken what you wanted originally on boardand has just done what she wanted. Perhaps you can have her in the bridal party (if you’re still up for it) but get someone else to do your hair – just tell her you want her to be able to relax and have fun on your wedding day, rather than working… Goodluck!

Post # 4
Member
3540 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

clip in hair extensions way to go!

Post # 5
Member
712 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

if you are uncomfortable with her doing your hair then you may have to tell her you decided to go a different way – just explain that you dont want your wedding hair to put a strain on your friendship. As for your actual hair dilemma – you have the option of rocking a short do or trying hair extensions.

Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
520 posts
Busy bee

I read this and I feel so bad for you.  Honestly, I would not have her do your wedding hair.  She is supposed to be your FRIEND!!  My initial thought was maybe she was jealous of you and intentionally sabatoged you…..  But, after you said she was smoking pot again, maybe she was just stoned.  Either way, she knew how you were growing your hair out and it sounds like she cut a lot off and didn’t do a good job.  Don’t feel bad about not having her do your wedding hair.  She blew that opportunity.  I hope you come up with a wedding hair style you like. 

I know what it’s like.  I was in a wedding in March and got my hair cut two weeks prior.  I hadn’t had it cut in a  while either and the stylist (a word I use to describe her now very loosely) attacked my bangs with a razor.  I ended up with short little kid bangs that were crooked and terrible.  I cried.

I’m so sorry.  hugz, maggie     

Post # 7
Member
5978 posts
Bee Keeper

I agree with some hair extensions. I think you’re being a little hard on her. Yes, I would certainly be upset if my hair was butchered right before my wedding too, but I don’t think she intentionally meant to do it. If you feel uncomfortable about her doing your hair, then have someone else do it the morning of the wedding.

I also think you need to stop cutting! I feel like the more you cut, the worse it’s looking. I know you’re trying to fix it, but cutting off more isn’t going to make it look any better! Try to deal with it as much as you can for now, or get it fixed once. It’s only goijng to get shorter!

Post # 8
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’d have extensions put in – not only for the wedding but till it grows out a bit, since your boss is getting on you about it. That way you can style it however you want for the wedding instead of dealing with the mess the other girl left you with.

Post # 9
Member
1726 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I agree with everyone telling you to find someone else to do your hair. She should understand, even if she is hurt. 

 

Here is a suggestion on how to get your hair to grow out fast. Silica drops you add to your water ( you can buy them at amazon.com or whole foods) and these supplements from Sephora are a life sizer! You will see so much hair growth in just a few weeks. If you start taking these now, it should at least grow out enough so you can do something with it for the big deal.

http://www.sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P2884

 

More importantly, you will look gorgeous on your wedding day because its the happiest day of your life, not because of your hair style, so don’t let this stress you out (easier said than done, I know) Good luck

Post # 11
Member
1391 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Okay here is my question not against you but in general…why didn’t you tell her to stop when she was getting so short? I mean I hear alot about people getting their hair hacked WAY too short and I just don’t get why you don’t speak up? When I was younger I had someone who was starting to go way shorter than what I wanted and I was in tears about it for a long time. I learned my lesson that if someone is going shorter on your hair its better to say something and risk hurting feelings than to have a hack job.

Anyways I definitely think you should enlist someone else to help you with her hair. Can the girl who “fixed” your hair for you maybe help with your hair for your wedding day?

Another idea and I know it probably isn’t one you will go for, but since you already have samples of some of the red extentions could you consider dying your hair to match one of the samples? I understand your hair is really rare and you worked so hard but if it is somethng that is gonna eat you up with being so short that’s another option!

Would you mind posting a pic for us to see? I bet since it is your hair you are naturally upset (I would be too) but maybe to us as outsiders it won’t be bad? and it might be helpful cause then we can rally and try and maybe find hairstyles for ya! Good luck I am so sorry that happened!

and p.s. I think you should talk with your friend who has taken up the pot because I would NOT want someone who was high cutting my hair, you could possibly save someone else from your experience if you tell her she needs to not do that while working!

 

Post # 12
Member
520 posts
Busy bee

How are the stylists that you work with currently?  Perhaps one of them could do  your wedding hair.  Unfortunately, about the only thing I can think of is to go thru hairstyle books and try to find a cute, pretty style for your wedding.  It sucks and I feel so bad for you.  But, as one of the other posters said, you will be amazingly beautiful because it will be your day. 

I love soft ringlets in chin length hair……so dainty…..

Post # 14
Member
1391 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Ah I am so sorry! 🙁 That sucks that someone who you normally go to was so awful this time around! I REALLY hope you get something figured out (hopefully without having to dye your pretty hair)! Although I am positive you will love great because it IS your wedding day after all! 🙂

Post # 15
Member
762 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

As a fellow hairstylist, I totally feel your pain. I notice mistakes others would never notice. I’m glad that your co-workers could fix it as much as they could and you trust them enough to be creative with your wedding style.

As for your friend I agree that it was intentional or she was NOT paying attention at all. Those kind of mistakes do not happen often. And you say she is talented so I don’t think she could be capable of that bad of a cut.

I am in a similar situation. I just quit a salon ’cause it’s going totally downhill and I’m going back to school. One of my friends that works there wants to do my hair for the wedding but she doesn’t see my vision. I always end up with an 80’s italian wedding ‘do. I am using the excuse of my mom needs her hair done too and we have tons to do the day of so I will get mine done by _______ and you can do mom’s hair at the same time. Maybe you could say, since you’re  a BM and gonna be super busy the day of, I’ve booked _____ to do my hair and we did a trial at work the other day and I loved it.

Could you color your hair w/ a demi-permanent to match the extentions? That is really my only advice without looking at the cut. If you have pics of it down, maybe I could help?

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