(Closed) :'( So upsetting and seeing red…the wedding is over….but still mad(long)

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Where to go from here? (other comments below please)
    Just leave it give up : (18 votes)
    20 %
    Try to email again : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Go in again speak to them : (9 votes)
    10 %
    Write a bad review and be done with it : (62 votes)
    69 %
  • Post # 3
    3786 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    Woah, this sounds awful but I’m glad most of your day went okay.  Is you DOC a pro, I know some people use friends, but if she’s done a lot of weddings she’ll know about these things and may be able to advise you better than me.  I’m the sort of person who wont give up until I get a satisfactory answer and not the email you received appointing all blame to anyone but themselves, but it’s up to you whether it’s worth it or not.

    Post # 4
    103 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    I’m sorry this happened to you. We had some issues at my wedding with our DJ.  I’ll put it nicely and say he wasn’t very good. A bridesmaid actually ended up cussing him out. Anyways, after our honeymoon I had wrote an email to the owener with very specific points on why I was unhappy, and he never replied. A couple of days later I had Darling Husband call and complain. The owner of the buisness basically said that they would never give money back, the DJ said he did a wonderful job, everyone loved him, ect. I was a little angry at this, but I decided to sit on it for a couple days. Within those days, I recieved a gift certificate, for the DJ company (who I would never use again in a million years), for $50 (our DJ cost $700). This tipped me over my edge. I went on theknot, and wrote a HORRIBLE review in my city’s thread. I even included the email that was never responded to. The NEXT day I recieved a call from the owner stating he was getting calls from brides canceling and what could he do to make us happy. In the end we got half of our money back. Yeah, I was really upset at how the DJ messed up parts of our ceremony (like my processional!), and it still irks me from time to time, but whats over is over.  If I were you, find every wedding website and post all of this info on every thread for your city you can find.  Brides will see this and not want to work with vendors like him, and I’m sure you will hear back from them with a nicer tune this time!

    Post # 5
    2699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I guess you have 2 options….take a deep breath, accept that things go wrong and let it go. Or, put down in an e mail, point by point, every issue that you have concerns with, demand a response to each point and state that a professional venue should respond respectfully to clientele and not exempt themselves from responsibility by either pointing the finger back or referring to other guests who didn’t experience the same problems.

    TBH, if I had received this e mail, I’d be narked so I don’t blame you at all. However, I also think given his initial response, that you’re unlikely to get any kind of an apology.

    Really sorry they’ve left you feeling like this about your wedding day.

    Post # 6
    1429 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    Wow. That all totally sux! but what’s done is done.

     I would definitely write as many bad reviews as I could!

    Post # 7
    46 posts

    I would take this IN A HEARTBEAT over the drama from my inlaws… but either way, it is the thing that made you upset. I totally understand. I think you should write a bad review, it will be therapeutic. And talk to your family about it and all vent together to let off the steam.

    Post # 8
    1340 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    You’ve obviously gone the civil route and he has now tried turning the blame on you and your SO, so other than to sue (and that’s not really any fun), I’d post poor service reviews anywhere they possibly advertise, including the Bee. The food was good, but the service was all-around lacking and then they blamed it on you. When I use my friend Google, the Bee ranks high in Google results and if I saw “XYZ Venue blah, blah, blah” I’d totally check it out.

    If your fee to the venue included the bartender than she should have been available to you the entire evening whether only Uncle Bob was drinking or everyone was getting tipsy–you paid for her and she was yours. 

    The highchair thing is a little random. They should have had one on hand somewhere, even if it was in a back room and it shouldn’t have taken that long to get it to you.

    And the DOC thing would have driven me nuts. You had already set up your tasks and wishes for the staff through DOC and they didn’t honor that, I personally would have sought out their Manager on Duty, or had my DOC do it, and explained that their staffing either have a waxy build-up in their ears or have trouble comprehending the finer points of the English language–assuming you weren’t speaking French or Greek. 😉


    Post # 9
    573 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Sounds aweful, I voted write a bad review and dont worry

    Post # 10
    5892 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I would make sure to write a short, fair and balanced, but truthful review on all the sites– Wedding wire, Google, Yelp, etc. It’s the only thing you can do at this point.

    So Sorry. My florist messed up my flowers and it’s been over a year and I’m still mad about it!

    Post # 11
    5657 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    Yeah I think you should just give them a bad review and move on. Getting upset about it now will not help anything and only makes you mre stressed out!

    Post # 12
    2373 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2008

    It sounds awful, but I would be sort of pissed at the DOC as well. Why was she not in control? When she saw the staff coming up to you, why did she not interject? If the bar was empty why wasn’t she talking to a manager? The venue was horrible, but the coordinator should have coordinated, you know?

     As for the email, I’d leave a bad review including the manager response. The whole part about lowest sales is rude.

    Post # 13
    201 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Wow that is shitty. I’m so sorry you had to deal with that- I’d be really upset too.

    This place sounds terrible. You can tell that he KNOWS they screwed up and in my opinion, makes a habit of bad service and weasling out of it with how he implied that you need to be apologizing to them and grateful for their service, because everyone else always is. I think it’s also pretty damning how he said twice that “at the end of the day, we set up and catered to your specifications…blah blah blah.” He’s basically saying, ” at the end of the day, we did a half-ass job and you just need to deal with it.”

    I would let him know that you disagree, point out why he’s wrong, and tell him that you are giving them a bad review and warning everyone you know who’s getting married not to work with them. Then you’ll just have to try to put it behind you, as I don’t think there’s much you can do otherwise.

    Very frustrating, but you’re married now- just try to move on and make happy memories together! 

    Post # 14
    1747 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    “As far as the bartender, I cannot understand how her level of service was an issue when that bar had the lowest sales of any wedding reception we have hosted this year and as such, had to find her side duties.”

    LOL, what??

    Maybe the bar sales were low because she was never there? Either way, her job is to be a bartender, not a professional texter.

    I would post a balanced review as well, but also post what he wrote you back as even if he did have any kind of leg to stand on (which he probably doesn’t), his reponse was extremely unprofessional and brides should know about it.

    Post # 15
    41 posts
    • Wedding: January 2012

    File a complaint with the Better Business Bureau.  None of that was your fault.  Adding a chair/highchair/booster seat should NOT be any kind of problem for any venue who regularly hosts weddings or even dinner.  His response was completely unsatisfactory.

    Post # 16
    2697 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Review them on Yelp too, if you can.

    I did that for a bridal salon that I had quite an annoying run in with (guy actually CALLED ME to bitch me out for leaving a 2 star review), so I put the whole conversation on there, verbatim, and lots of people messaged me telling me that was helpful.

    The problem with sites like WeddingWire is that the vendor can actually pull reviews that show them unfavorably. Ridiculous. YELP doesn’t do that.

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