Post # 1
Am I the only one who gets this question all the time?
DH and I started TTC last month. I’m a bit older, have PCOS, and am generally just nervous that it will be difficult for me to get pregnant. I’d rather not have to dodge questions thoroughout this whole process, and honestly, I’d rather no one even know we’re TTC.
I’m generally a very open person, which is why I think all my friends feel comfortable asking this. But having a baby is sacred to me — and I don’t want to talk about it.
So, what’s a nice way of telling people to mind their own beeswax?
Post # 3
I would just say ” we just aren’t quite ready…but we’re getting closer”. That way they know not to be shocked when you do get pregnant (goodluck), but won’t ask all the questions..(hopefully)
Post # 4
We get it all the time. Some of our friends even watch me closely when we go out, to see if I drink alcohol or not. It’s annoying and I thought about randomly not drinking one time but then having a drink the next time, just to mess with them.
After smiling politely and trying to give a vague answer ever since we got married, I’m starting to really get sick of the “When are you having a baby?!?!?!” question. I thought of a few possible responses:
“When people stop asking about it” –> I tried that one, and it generated a few jokes, but then it came up over and over again as a running gag.
“When DH’s sperm fertilizes my egg and a successful implementation follows” –> Absolutely correct answer to the question, and still vague. This is what I will try next!
“Next Thursday at 3.15 p.m.” –> I will use this when I get fed up.
“As soon as I kick my crack habit.” –> When I get fed up and the other person doesn’t easily get offended.
Post # 5
Its so rude for people to ask that, I would say, “when we decide to” and just leave it at that
Post # 6
I would tell them “when I feel the need to discuss it, I will, but for right now, I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t bring it up again.”
We have been adamant for years that we are not having kids, but that doesn’t stop people from making the comments all the time!! It drives me nuts, so now I’ll just say whatever comes to my mind to piss them off. Its no ones business about your sex life, no matter how close they are to you.
I am looking into permanent sterlization for one or both of us, and I can’t wait to be able to say,
“I can’t have kids anymore, so you can stop asking now.” I know your situation is different because you want them, but trust me, people feel that its their place to ask no matter what the situation
Post # 7
We get it all the time & we haven’t even gotten married yet. I think chittychittybanebane has the perfect response. Good luck
Post # 8
@bells: I wish I could just leave it at that. I tried all polite versions of “it’s our decision”. This usually prompts “But it must happen soon!” or “I bet you will be pregnant within the next x months!”. I even got ridiculous advice on how to get pregnant faster (including the mentioning of CM and ‘boners’).
I had someone respond that I need to get pregnant soon because I’m pretty old and then there won’t be much time left for the second one, because obviously my kid can’t possibly be an only child. This came from an older lady I hardly know. Two months after my wedding.
Post # 9
@AprilJo2011: ha, I love these. Some of my friends are on permanent alcohol watch, too. Having a wine glass in my hand has inspired, “So I guess you’re not pregnant!” and, worse, “You probably shouldn’t be drinking if you want to get pregnant.” Aaah!
Post # 10
@stillme: Isn’t it amazing? When I ordered a soda last time, I was interrogated. They only let it go after I said out loud “I’m NOT pregnant!”.
Post # 11
@AprilJo2011: It’s insane. I’m almost at the point now where I’m afraid NOT to order an alcoholic drink, for fear of the raised eyebrows etc. that will surely follow if, gasp, I order a soda!
Glad to know I’m not alone on this one. 🙂
Post # 12
That question is so personal. I don’t think anyone who isn’t super close with me has the right to ask, but, of course, my husband’s extended family tends to disagree with me on that. :p
Post # 13
i get it all the time. i just keep telling people that we will have kids when you offer to babysit during the week so we can still work and pay off bills. that seems to quiet them up really quickly!
honestly i just dont want everyone ive ever talked to know what DH and trying or not trying to do.
we will have kids when we are ready!
Post # 13
@AprilJo2011: These are great! You should definitely not drink one night then drink the next to mess with them. 😉
It’s funny – we’re in the process of moving our wedding date up from June to February and the MOMENT we mention that, eyebrows shoot up 3 miles and we get the immediate, “WHY….ARE YOU PREGNANT!?”
Hahaha, I actually have started to say, “I’m not pregnant!” in the same breath as the news before they get a chance to ask. We just can’t wait to be married, relax!
As the first of each of our families to get married (and we’re both the youngest AND in our late 20s), I’m sure we’ll be bombarded with the baby pressure 5 minutes after the ceremony. Bah!
Post # 14
Ugh, why do people think this is their business? I’ve already been asked 3-4 times and we are 23 and married for only 3 months! I just laugh it off but I’m really dreading the holidays when DH’s family will all decide that our sex life is completely and totally their business. Thank God SIL is pregnant and due in Jan so hopefully they’ll hound her instead. I’m trying to come up with a snarky response that clearly states it’s not their business and they should stop asking. Grrrrr.
Post # 15
Oh and totally have planned on doing the drinking one time and not the next. Just to mess with them.