Post # 1
This is a difficult one since my Fiance has 2 kids from a previous marriage & they will be in the bridal party. The best man has 2 kids, the Maid/Matron of Honor has 1 kid. But the killer is with all our guests about 50% are kids for a small guest list of 30. We are leaning towards a restaurant reception at night. It is not very kid friendly. We have had a lot of trouble deciding on our venue due to kids. Some venues want us to pay the same for them which includes alcohol but it has more areas for them to play. Some of the kids I hear are raucous & uncontrollable. That venue, due to their minimum spend required would mean we are paying $216 per kid!
We can’t say no to all kids due to us wanting my Fiance’s kids there. I thought of explaining that if they weren’t his kids & in the bridal party that we wouldn’t have any but the Best Man is coming from out of town with his wife & kids. What would they do with them? They might be offended & cancel or just cancel cos of difficulty. If they come too then the Maid/Matron of Honor should bring hers cos she is also from out of town, even though her brother lives here, then how can I tell everyone else no kids?
Post # 3
If you just have your FI’s kids at the wedding, as part of the bridal party (Flower girl/Ring bearer) I don’t think anyone else should be upset about it. Does the Maid/Matron of Honor and BestMan have other family members that won’t be attending that can babysit?
Post # 4
People know that members of the bridal party are extra special, and therefore I don’t think they get bent out of shape when special exceptions are made for them (ie only those people can bring their kids) If your Maid/Matron of Honor and best man are allowed to bring their kids, I doubt anybody will feel slighted.
Post # 5
creativeplannertobee the Maid/Matron of Honor does but Best Man is coming from out of town with wife & their family is not here with them so that is the only concern. He is my FH long time friend.
Post # 6
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with inviting some children but not others. That’s what we’re doing–inviting kids we’re close to and those for people traveling out of state. Otherwise, not really necessary, in my opinion.
Post # 7
Thanks Babylou, unfortunately most of them are traveling from out of state. I guess I’ll just have to accept that people have kids.
Post # 8
wow I’m dealing with this as well while creating my guest list… I would prefer NO KIDS but I of course want my son there and the little flower girl… I can imagine how rude I’d look if just my son whose 6 (he’ll be half way to 8 by the time of our wedding) and the flower girl whose 4 (and will have just turned 5 by the time of our wedding) would be allowed… sigh
Post # 9
@lovlea1: i have a similar situation, but i am only allowing kids of the bridal party to come. $200+ for a child is just an awful lot of money. I like the idea of them being part of the wedding party (then people can’t feel slighted if their kids were not included). Aside from ring bear and flower girl (s), you can have one of the kids announce you – my friend had little boys ring a bell running down the aisle saying “here comes the bride”it was cute.
Please remember, it is your wedding – you should be able to set the tone. if your venue does not work well with kids, then that might be something that will make you uncomfortable and distracted on your day.
Post # 10
Hey it’s your day – you can invite whoever you want! My friend had a no kid rule but allowed their daughter, niece and nephew to come.
We don’t have kids – but are allowing the kids of some of our family members to come.