Post # 1
Okay so really how hard is it to read an invitation? After agonizing over the guest list future hubby and I decided not to invite children to our wedding. That would make our guest list from 90 to over 200! We are getting married alittle later in life and most of our friends and family have children. So I toiled over the RSVP cards and supposedly found a “PC” way to say children NOT invited…. or so we thought. I had found on the internet a blog by another bride that did the RSVP cards where they wrote on the card exactly who was invited and at the bottom said we have reserved so many spots for you. Now this is what we did as well to try to eliminate the PLUS 1’s etc…. Just fine and dandy until we receive the RSVP card from one of his groomsman and girlfriend. His girlfriend put a sticky note on the card saying don’t forget the 5 freaking children and GRANDMA! Are you serious??!!!! PLUS 6!!??? Can you NOT read??!! Now understand that some of the children are not really children and teenagers in high school but still I DO NOT want to be responsible for other peoples children at my own wedding where there will be alcohol served at the reception. Now grant it some of the children are future hubbys godchildren but if we invite them then we need to invite EVERYONE’s children. The only children who are invited are out of town family. Future hubby is upset about this and I told him I have no problem being bad guy to groomsman girlfriend. But are you freakin serious your brining GRANDMA to the wedding too? Did you NOT read the invitation GRANDMA is NOT FREAKIN invited! I’m waiting to see how future hubby plays this out I told him to deal with it. I feel really about about the kids because they just adore future hubby but seriously if you have a dang question about the invitation and RSVP then ASK! UGH…..
Post # 3
@CwgrlBabe2000:You need to nip this in the bud straight away. Children are children, whether they’re 7 or 17. It is your FH’s job to CALL his groomsman and tell him this is NOT acceptable and that there will be a spot reserved for HIM and his girlfriend. HE needs to do this now.
Post # 4
Um. Wow. That’s ridiculous, and also kinda hilarious. Glad to hear your FI is dealing with it.
Post # 5
Whose children? The girlfriend’s children? The groomsman’s?
Perhaps your FI could suggest that granny babysit the children since none of them are welcome at your wedding.
Post # 6
Plus 6! omg, people have some nerve. If someone tried to add 6 people, I’d send them an invoice for $900, to cover the added food, drinks, table rental, linens, centrepieces etc it would cost to have them there.
Post # 7
WHAT?! “Don’t forget”?? Uh, I’m sure you DID NOT forget whose names were on the invite list and therefore put on the invite. And on a sticky note, nonetheless? My jaw dropped.
I worry like CRAZY over this as well, since we’re having adults only. The only exception will be my 3 first cousins, since FI is inviting all of his and they are my only ones (Mind you, my aunt would bring them even if they weren’t invited). I’m convinced we should put “Adult’s Only” on the invite somewhere, but my parent’s are adamant that people will understand by who we address it to (ie, without the “And Family”, etc). sigh, just because YOU always understood it, doesn’t mean everyone else will… especially after reading all these other related posts about RSVPs. I know I’ll be calling/emailing people telling them that their snot-nosed kids aren’t invited…
Post # 8
@MightySapphire: Ha, I was just going to suggest that. Grandma and the 5 little (or not so little) ones can have a family party of their own!
Post # 9
Plus 6? Don’t forget? What is this woman, a neanderthal???
Listen, you don’t need any reasons why you don’t want kids. It’s your wedding, end of story.
Post # 10
Thank You all for the responses and understanding my frustration! We specifically did the RSVP’s writing in who exactly was invited so they couldn’t “ADD” anyone and put a line on there how many spots were reserved for them. It’s NOT like I addressed the outside envelope AND family…. I told the FH to let me be the bad guy in this situation… The groomsman IS his friend let them be mad at me I’m not worried about if they like me or not because I wouldn’t let the kids come to the wedding. I do have a feeling this was the girlfriends doing not the groomsman. But seriously if they had a question all they had to do was ASK! I mean come on right how hard is it to pick up the phone? I VERY politely sent her an email this morning stating that I received their RSVP and we are thrilled Mr. Groomsman and Ms. Girlfriend are coming to the wedding. Unfortunately due to budget, venue size, and alcohol being served at the reception we are not inviting children. Also due to budget constraints we are not allowing any extra guests. It was somthing we toiled over for a long time. But we promised to make it up to FH’s godchildren after the wedding. (Notice I said FH’s godchildren not Ms. Girlfriends children or GRANDMA!) And told them again we are thrilled Mr. Groomsman and Ms. Girlfriend are coming to the wedding. And if they have any questions to contact me or FH. End of story. I mean seriously I know we are having a western wedding but we aren’t REDNECK! GRRRRR LOL Thanks for letting me vent!
Post # 11
@CwgrlBabe2000:Very nice approach 😀
Post # 12
It sounds like you handled it perfectly with your email to GF. Seriously, what nerve. I am dying to know … do your or your FI even know “Grandma?”
Post # 13
@indibee:lol this made me think of the broadcasts they do from bars in athletes home towns. Maybe you can pipe in a live feed of your wedding to a local Chuck e Cheese and all the kids could celebrate with you from there 😀
Post # 14
Wow that really sucks, I’m so sorry that you have to go through this.
Post # 15
@CwgrlBabe2000: Good for you! Your approach was spot on. Some people just don’t get it.
Post # 16
Wow. Just wow! I want to know he reply to your email!