Post # 1
This is a girl that I see at school every few months and at occasional religious events. She also made some comments about me always having a face full of makeup even though I wear makeup like twice a month and I don’t see her everyday or even every week lol I just laughed off everything she said and then when I left I started getting annoyed. Is this socially acceptable now cause I would never mention someone’s weight to them, especially an acquaintance.
Also, she said she just thought I would be working out like crazy cause I’m getting married and then started telling me what planks I should be doing even though I work out twice a week and I plank just fine. what the actual heck lol
Post # 3
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
Ugh. She sounds like she wants to stir up drama simply for the entertainment factor, or perhaps she makes those comments to feel better about herself.
I would NEVER comment on anyone’s weight except for FI, and not unsolicited.
Post # 2
bossypants: just chalk it up to rudeness.
The only people I discuss weight with are my gym buddies, and even then, we only comment about our own bodies. I cannot fathom commenting on someone else’s body, especially unsolicited comments.
Post # 4
bossypants: That totally rude. I don’t understand why people want to talk about others’ weight. DH’s grandma has a HORRIBLE habit of always commenting on my weight. She never says I’m fat, but, for instance, during my prgennacy the last timer she saw me she kept asking if the doctors were watching my weight, how much I’ve gained, if I’m at high risk, all these pressing questions that just weren’t her business.
Before I got pregnant when I had lost a ton of weight she kept asking me how much I’ve lost, how much I have left to lose, where I’ve lost it all at, if I have loose skin or stretch marks becuase of it, etc just all these really personal questions I wouldn’t dive into no matter if it were family or not.
Post # 5
gingerkitten: I think it makes her feel better cause she was saying how she was 130 lbs but she’s solid …whatever that means lol
flowercrowns: definitely. I would also never comment especially these days where you really have no idea what someone’s health/medical situation is like.
megz06: yea that sucks when someone is so insistent on knowing about your weight especially when you’ve been pregnant!
Post # 8
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
bossypants: So… she’s saying she’s dense? LOL
Post # 6
That’s really a horrible thing to say to someone. How rude.
Post # 7
bossypants: Wow she’s rude. Like really really rude. Why on earth is it her business how much make-up you wear or the state of your body?
Evidently she has some pretty low self-esteem if that’s the topics she picks to talk to people about… next time she says she starts, just make a comment how you both have the same body shape, even if you don’t. Like anything she says about her body, just go “Yeah and our arms and abs are really similar… we could be sisters!” Just mess. with. her.
Post # 9
Hang in there, hunny. Some people just don’t recognize what harm their words can do. Most people have the social grace to avoid such comments, but others…they really are just unaware of their impact (or the very few who are genuinely out to hurt…but that’s very, very few!).
Keep in mind that you are beautiful. No matter what shape and size. It’s more important to be happy and healthy and comfortable with yourself than to be concerned with what others deem as important. And it sounds like you are! Someone else’s perception of what you should be doing for your body before your wedding is *their* problem (seriously, look at that statement again. What YOU should be doing for YOUR body before YOUR wedding.).
Sorry that this happened. Chin up! Smile. Let it roll off your beautiful shoulders!
Post # 11
bossypants: What a bitch.
She was definitely trying to cut you down a bit. Ignore her rudeness! That is not a nice thing to say EVER. The only time someone should offer core exercise suggestions is if they are directly asked for them. Laughing it off was the right response.
Post # 12
bossypants: Is it a cultural things? My all time favorite hairstylist would make very blunt comments about my appearance and weight, both positive and negative, she was generally a very sweet person, but she was Vietnamese, so I think those kinds of direct comments were socially acceptable in her culture. She was an amazing hair dresser, so I put up with the occasional unsolicited comment about my weight.
If there’s no cultural issues or social awkwardness going on here, then the girl at school is just a rude bitch. I would be just as direct as she is and tell her “my appearance is none of your business. You don’t need to comment on things that don’t concern you”
Post # 13
BeckyBB : I am actually insecure about my stomach but I don’t dress to show it ever so it definitely stung when I heard that but by no means am I even close to overweight so that’s why I didn’t get too upset..although I have a feeling that if I actually was obviously overweight, she would never say something like that. I agree with everything you said about the wedding statement. She literally has no idea what priorities are when planning a wedding
Fizzy8: Yea, I realize now that she was trying to cut me down although I have no idea why
WestCoastV: So I’m Guyanese and the girl who said this to me is half Guyanese half Peruvian. In my culture it’s normal for family to comment about weight but most definitely not to acquaintances, especially when we both grew up here so I feel like American etiquette (not commenting on weight) is what we’re used to