Post # 1
“Oh, sorry, I don’t remember your name…” then she turned to another aunt and said “Remember (son)? How he’s brought over so many girlfriends, after a while I stopped trying to remember them.”
Ouch. How do you deal with that, emotionally? How do you get over it when you know you’ll be “just the girlfriend” for at least two more years? (if you don’t know me–I’m mostly only here right now because I find weddings fascinating and I like looking at pics of cakes and stuff :)–I’d probably be a wedding planner if I could)
I guess I mostly just needed to vent a little to someone who might understand the feeling. I couldn’t quite explain it to bf.
Then this morning he says to me “I can’t wait to call you my wife.” He does this just to bug me, I swear. (In a playful way, not an annoying way!)
Post # 3
How many times has she met you? What did your SO say?
I would be upset by that too.
Post # 4
How rude!! Why will it be two more years if he’s saying things like that now?
Post # 5
Oh, that’s rather rude! I’d be a bit stung, too. I’m sassy, so I’d likely be all ‘U-r-a-c-i-l, Uracil. You should remember this one, it’ll be the last one you need to learn ;-)’
But that would depend on if they’re stuffy aunts or if they’d play along and it would make them realize that they were a bit rude with their comment.
Post # 6
@KatNYC2011: Oh, she’s only met me a handful of times. I wouldn’t be particularly bothered by the comment (though the rest of his family did remember) if not for what she said to his other aunt. I mean, I was right there, you know? That alone made me feel even more insignificant.
He actually wasn’t around to hear it, but he wasn’t too pleased when I told him after.
@MsLotus: We’re both waiting to be finished with school, which will take a year. The second year… I don’t remember his reasoning. I think it was time for him to find a job after graduation, I think I recall him saying something like if he somehow found one right away it could hasten things.
Post # 7
“It’s [Uracil], it’s a pleasure to meet you again – I believe we last met at [Christmas, as well as the last two Thanksgivings and Debbie’s wedding]. Will we see you at [Thanksgiving/John’s wedding]?”
Really, being rude will only hurt you later, even though what she said was rude. About the best you can do is say “well, I plan on staying” but that’s in your face, so better to avoid entirely and instead remind her of why she really ought to try to remember you by listing family gatherings you’ve both been at. Then mention future plans you’re making to suggest you’re around for the long haul.
Post # 8
@kay01: Yeah, all I did was smile and introduce myself. If it happens again I’ll see if I can elaborate a bit. Thanks 🙂
Post # 9
@Uracil: Oh don’t get me wrong. If that happened to me, I’d be sputtering and not think of anything to say at the moment.
Post # 10
wow that was rude. why can’t people think before they speak?
Post # 11
W-oo-w. Classy lady… I would be stung, too. Though I probably wouldn’t handle it the way I’d want to (lots-a-sass!) and instead would just smile, looking sad and hurt, and move on. If you’re happy with him, just keep dating and see where things go. Once she gets a wedding invitation maybe she’ll learn to remember your name.
I am curious, too, what your BF said?
Post # 12
I’ve been told similar things that while aren’t that rude….are pretty awful.
I sympathize, and glad that your SO was appalled as well. Just as he should be. 🙂
Post # 13
I think the best thing you can do is kill them with kindness and bite your tounge you dont want to say anything that will come back to bite you in the butt when you get engaged, some people are just rude/nasty by nature and all you can do is try to not let it get to you
Post # 14
Don’t feel too bad! My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 and a half years and his dad kept calling me a totally different name last week haha.
Although I agree she was very rude. Just shrug it off and don’t let it bother you. They’ll see eventually that you’re there for the long haul.
Post # 15
My boyfriend’s grandmother used to call me his ex-girlfriend’s name (right after we started dating). His grammy is a really nice old gal and she didn’t mean anything by it. He had been with his ex, a former friend of mine, for quite some time, but they broke up long before we ever started seeing each other and it stung like hell. The second or third time she did it, I ran out of the room and cried, which was totally embarrassing for me as well as for his granny, who didn’t say it maliciously in the slightest. Fortunately, it’s been a year and a half since that incident and she has made sure to get my name right ever since!
Post # 16
Aw, she was probably just trying to be funny. But yeah, that sucks 🙁