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I am not there yet but I imagine I would be too with a month left. It just seems to time consuming to try and find a "deal" with so little time. I would suggest to not stress too much. If it's a little thing, do you really need to get it? Maybe you could just skip it? Good luck. Try not to be too stressed.
i'm in the to heck w/ it boat (well today's a little better) - not from a financial perspective but from a details view. if it's not planned for already, it's just not going to be added.
reserving seats for the ceremony - out! hope everyone's been to enough weddings to realize the 1st 2 rows are usually reserved for family.
gifts for friends who've done a lot along the way - well if it doesn't get done before the wedding, they'll still be around after our honeymoon!
We did this. We got to the end and sort of said "f**k it, we can afford it." And we could, but we also regret it now. We ended up buying things because we were tired of looking, and panicked and overwhelmed. And I wish we have that nice chunk of cash now.
Make a list of what is left to spend. Then cut the extras. One of the best weddings I ever saw (maybe on snippet and ink, can't remember) was a bride who was an architect. She said that when she got to the end of any project, she started to edit. To take off any of the last minute extras she had put on, to carve it down to what was essential, and beautiful. The result was elegant, refined, and frankly, badass. And cheaper. So get a glass of wine, muster up your courage and figure out what doesn't need to happen.
For what it is worth a wedding for 400 on a 12K budget does seem... improbable. Maybe not impossible. But really, really tough.
*You post sort of reads like a poem. Like an angry, frustrated bride poem. :)
I was saying on another thread the other day that I wish I 'd gotten there. I was so tight fisted until the bitter end. In that last week, I probably just needed to throw money at a couple of problems, and it would have made things easier. I stuck to my budget fastidiously instead.
Then, after the wedding, Mr. DG's family tells us they had $X (insert large number here) more to give to us (because they know that everyone always goes over budget). Grrr... I was a freak about expenses.
yeah
I thought I was good til I got unexpected expenses (1)my bro who cant afford to fly over his daughter and changes in their flights--there goes one grand, (2) painfully costly alterations whew there's another 700 (3) entertaining family while in town with a dad out of a job and my bro who is broke there's another couple of hundred
I feel bad because I love my family I feel disloyal saying these things but its like no matter how hard I cut costs and bargain something bigger comes and bites me in the butt
I'm there. We started to throw money at certain things just to be done with it. We didn't go TOO much over budget though, and it helped that 10 guests who were pretty certain they were coming (close family members) couldn't make it, so that saved us some money, too :)
But yeah, I think it's worth it sometimes so long as you can still like, you know ... pay your bills 'n stuff :)
I'm in the same boat as nybride09. We would actually have stayed completely within budget, if parents didn't keep adding guests. :(
We can't really cut per person costs, and there are no cuts that can be made now to bring us back down to budget, so I'm basically at the "no extra details" stage. We're doing exactly what we planned (although I will bargain hunt a little more) and we are not adding a thing. No matter how good of an idea it seems.
when we got engaged my mother threw a $15K cheque at us and said do what you want - we eloped.
i will say we were looking at at $150 per head wedding reception but instead we did a $70 per head celebration party lunch. seriously, as soon as you say wedding you might as well double the estimate... i dont know how alot of brides do it!
i would cry if i had to invite 400 people omg and wouldnt be tears of joy hahaha.i am cutting so many unneccessary things from the wedding planning to avoid stree like this.
400 people and 12K? No wonder you're stressed. Mrs. DG - it almost would have been better if they'd never mentioned the extra money than mention it *after* the wedding, but it was really sweet of them to budget for it.
DG* You always make me laugh! Sometimes I wish I had known you BEFORE your wedding. I have gone back and read a couple of the posts hehe.
I'm with NYbride as well. Forget the details. Anything that doesn't need to be done at this point isn't getting done. No programs, no reserved seats at the ceremony, not enough rocks in the vases, we'll freakin live. If I don't make any more decisions, FI can't complain about the price of them! hehe.
just don't forget, it's one day - sure it's a really important day, but your marriage is what is most important.
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I'd love to say that I had an unlimited budget, but I didn't.
I'd love to say I had a reasonable budget... but I didn't.
No one inviting 400 people to their wedding can expect to spend only $12k on a wedding.
You can't.
It's impossible.
Or. if it's possible, don't tell me. I don't want to know if someone else was able to do it, because I don't want to feel like a loser.
So.
It's come down to this.
One month left.
Tons of little things left.
And an inability to care about the budget anymore.
Has anyone else come across this problem?
So much left to do - all little details that can drive a person crazy... and just wanting to throw money at it to make sure it gets done on time instead of trying to bargain shop?
My fiance doesn't appreciate this much, but he also doesn't want me to go insane and/or levitate in freakish over-detailed agony.
So. I think he made a wise choice.
Anyone else in the 'to heck with it' boat?