Post # 1
..and now i know for sure my proposal isnt coming for a while 🙁 basically i wanted to make sure we were still on the same page so i asked if we were “still on” in the marriage dept..he said yes but not til our lives have some permanence (which as of right now were expecting to move..maybe). He told me he wanted to get into the military first(which should be fairly soon) and get situated before proposing, marriage etc. All of this sounds reasonable, just sucks that i have to wait monttthhsss from now! ::sigh:: At least now i know somewhat of his timeline..and that my journey to pre engagement land isnt too far off! Definitely still making that chicken soon just for extra good luck 😉
Post # 3
at least you got some clue of when it would happen. my boyfriend and i had that talk and all i got out of him is “when the time is right”. well can the time be right soon? haha
Post # 4
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
At least you have an idea!! I hope it comes soon!
Post # 5
Good for you for having the talk with him. I’m glad he was straight with you. My FI wanted the same thing. Everything had to be in order (his opinion of order) before he proposed. Good luck.
BTW, is there any chance he’s saying that to throw you off?
Post # 6
it’s good you have an idea. sure it still sucks to be waiting but you know you’re getting towards the end of that tunnel and not just stuck somewhere in the middle.
Post # 7
If it makes you feel any better. My Fiance and I had talked many times about getting engaged before it happened. And the day he proposed (only a few hours earlier!) we had a whole conversation about how we weren’t going to get engaged for another year because he wanted to save up more! And he had the ring in his pocket! I was completely thrown and thought he was joking when he proposed! So, don’t lose hope! As long as you know it is happening, just relax and go with the flow! Who knows when it will happen!?
Post # 8
There is some comfort in knowing. My FI and I talked about engagement a while before it happened, and it mostly had to do with him wanting things to be settled with school and work. Now we’re only 5 days away from the wedding!
Post # 9
I hope it comes soon as well and that things settle down!
Post # 10
I feel your pain… its been 2+ years and I know we cant even have the talk yet because we both need to get hold of a job that allows for some kind of permanent arrangement…
Post # 11
FI made an analogy to cooking meat when we had the ‘talk’ – we’d been together about a year and I was getting ANTSY so I asked him what his timeline was and what he was thinking. I really wanted to know if we were on the same page or if I was the only one thinking about marriage before we were in our forties (we were 30 and 33 at the time) and he said, and I quote, ‘it’s like a leg of lamb’ My response – WHAT??? Basically he was saying, when it’s ready, it’s ready. So I told him not to wait too long or the leg of lamb would be old and dried out… I only had to wait another year or so (agh…too long…) But at least I knew I wasn’t completely crazy to think we’d end up married. 117 days to go :0)
Post # 12
@anam: old and dried out LMBO!!
@fuschia: we’ll be waiting together 😀 our situation isn’t one where we can get engaged due to finances… so at least we’ll be waiting buddies!! keep your head up ;D
Post # 13
@crebre80 – I know right, but what could I do??? He had me at ‘leg of lamb’… :oD
For you and for Fuchsia – it’s worth the wait when it’s worth the wait!! And when it’s NOT worth the wait, it really isn’t worth the wait… if you know what I mean!
Post # 14
I think the anticipation of knowing is good but also not knowing when keeps you interested!!! I thought my FI was going to propose at many different times (they were like perfect romantic opportunities) but he decided to wait until he felt like it was the right night. Digression…we went out the night after Thanksgiving to some bar and we danced to “You are so beautiful”. That’s when he told me he knew it was the right night!!
I feel for you all that are waiting for the marriage part. My FI decided that everything had to be right first too, which bothers the living heck out of me because I don’t know when that is!! It’s frustrating, but its also really nice to know that he wants it to be the best it can be.
Post # 16
I just had the same talk with my BF! It is good to make sure you are still on the same page. My BF and I decided that it’s best if we get engaged before March, because that will be before he starts competing again. Keep on checking in every few months or so just to make sure you guys are still in synch!