(Closed) Sorry, this is long, and rambling, and generally miserable. I needed to vent.

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
368 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I know how you feel. I was actually just thinking this last night and kind of getting upset because I feel like weddings show people’s true colors. I have lost 2 friends because of some wedding drama, and now one of my FI’s friends is complaining that he doesn’t have any time for him anymore. I feel like some people just don’t know how to be happy for other people, they always think they should voice their opinion on everything. The fact of the matter is it’s our weddings and we should be able to chose what we want without being judged or having snide remarks. I know it sounds horrible, but sounds like your bridal party is wrapped up in their own stuff. Try to hang in there and not let it get you down. πŸ™‚

Post # 4
Member
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I also understand what your going through! And I’m sorry that you have to! Instead of planning your wedding, your dealing with everyone elses “stuff”. Its disapointing, expecially dealing with it, while you have other things in your life already going on, school, work, etc! Sometimes I just want to throw in the towel and go to the court house. I just want to be Married to my FI, I didnt know to get there i would have to deal with so much from so many other people!

Post # 6
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Just wanted to say sorry about your sister, she sounds like she was a bit jealous.  But they really might end up together forever, so learn from her mistakes and be supportive of her whatever her choices are.

How long did you give your BMs to respond?  Maybe message them or text or call them individually (not FB) and just say something along the lines of, “Hey, I’m not trying to nag but we really need to get this sorted out soon……”  Hopefully they come around!  I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time!

Post # 9
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Wow.  It’s too bad that she feels like she has to compete with you.  I think older sisters get upset sometimes when they aren’t the first one to marry, especially if they really thought they would be.  I’ve seen that on WB too, where people say something along the lines of “and such and such YOUNGER couple got engaged first”…I guess sometimes people feel like they’re behind or something.  Everyone needs to just live and let live!  I think if you take that attitude toward your sister you at least won’t have to regret any pettyness or anything like that.  πŸ™‚

Post # 11
Member
368 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

The friends that I lost along the way weren’t really that good of friends. They are getting married less than a month after me and added me to their bridal party last minute after someone else dropped out. I said I would be in it but then realized it’s too much money right now for us, as well as their wedding is a week after we get back from our honeymoon. It was just too much, but she didn’t understand and said I ruined her wedding because I dropped out. A little dramatic right? lol

Your sister is probably just projecting on you. My sister had some things to say about how young I am at my bachlorette party too. It’s just some form of jealousy or insecurity, so just try to brush it off unless it’s really bothering you then you need to say something. I would try and call them and just explain you need some help, because maybe they don’t realize they aren’t being very supportive. Good luck! Glad you got your frustration out here!

 

As yes, we are down to the wire and I am so excited!!

Post # 12
Member
368 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I agre with jslsbride…I have seen other sisters try and race each other down the aisle! I guess, like you said, nobody wants to feel behind.

Post # 13
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Sucks that you’re going through this.  I don’t know how close your girlfriends live or whatever else they have going on in their lives, but that might have something to do with their lack of attention. 

I had a friend get married while I was in law school.  A lot of the bridal party was still in school (or just started out working) and scattered across different states.  I love my friend, but sometimes the expense and time involved was a little overwhelming.  Sometimes we all felt like it was a little much…I’m sure she didn’t feel that way though, and in turn, I’m sure we won’t feel that way if any of us decide to have bridesmaids.

I know it is probably not popular to say this on a board where everyone is getting married, but you do have to remember that there are a lot of other things going on in people’s lives besides your wedding.  I’m not saying this is your attitude, but I think it is easy to lose sight of πŸ™‚  Try not to be so hard on them, I’m sure they care about you and your wedding… you just have to realize it is not going to be everyone’s top priority.

Post # 15
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Have you been very clear (in a nice way) about your expectations?  Sometimes people don’t know what is expected of them, especially if it is their first wedding. 

Post # 16
Member
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Ya my BMs really dont help with anything either, just my MOH that is throwing me my shower.  None of them, i have 5, has ever asked if i needed any help at all.  I guess people are just busy with their lives and they will never understand how important and special it is until they actually get married themselves then  they will look back and realize what a horrible BM they were

The topic ‘Sorry, this is long, and rambling, and generally miserable. I needed to vent.’ is closed to new replies.

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