Spending money dilemma: Hypocritical? Or different situations?

posted 3 years ago in Married Life
  • poll: Is it hypocritical? (Pls read in full before voting)
    Yes : (4 votes)
    17 %
    No : (13 votes)
    57 %
    Ice cream tonight is a great idea : (6 votes)
    26 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7281 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    It really depends. When you protested the trips, did you protest on the basis of money or did the issue of money come up as part of the discussion?> If so, then you’re probably being hypocritical. But if the disagreement was solely about the use of precious vacation time, and money was never an issue, then I don’t see the hypocrisy.

    Post # 5
    Member
    7285 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    How the hell are two B-trips, that use vacation time (includes, hotel, F&B, and other transportation expenses) even remotely comparable to sending money on a laser treatment (that’s Groupon at that, meaning its majorly discounted)… Really?? And then to top if off, you haven’t gone on your honeymoon yet, but he’s out celebrating someone elses impending marriage?

    Your hubby is REACHING to say the least. 

    And yes, ice cream anytime is a good idea. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    441 posts
    Helper bee

    @kay01:  I suggest saying, “Oh dang, you’re right, that was very hypocritical of me. Don’t worry babe, I’m canceling the laser treatment. I’m going to embrace my natural body hair. And go ahead and use your vacation time on bachelor parties. Don’t bother calling me, because I’ll be at the nudist commune with my new hippie friends, and they don’t have a phone there. The orgies are only on Tuesdays, you’ll be back before then right?”

    Post # 7
    Member
    7281 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    @kay01:  I can see where he may think you are being a bit hypocritical since you keep your monies seperate partially so that you can each spend without the other having getting his/her panties in a bunch, and then you got upset that he was spending on bachelor parties (his stuff) while he was cool with you spending on laser treatments (your stuff).

    But I think this points to some issues that go beyond whether or not someone is being a bit hypocritical. It goes to how you two choose to spend your resources (time, energy, and money). If I had to guess, you feel like he is not giving you the best of his resources, like you are getting the short end of the stick, like you are not as high of a priority as you want to be. Now that’s only based on what I am reading here. But if it feels like what I’m saying is hitting a bit close to home, then you may want to sit down with him and try to get to the bottome of things. Oftentimes anger and upsetness are just covers for deeper and more difficult emotions and vulnerabilities that you don’t want to deal with. It may be time for both of you to dig under the surface emotions and address what lies beneath.

    Post # 9
    Member
    7281 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    @kay01:  Since you’ve already started the discussion of priorities, and how we as individuals use money as an expression of our priorities, it may be an opportunity to re-visit the subject. Since he brought it up as an example of you being a hypocrite, he’s clearly still holding on to those negative emotions from that time. It’s something that he needs to work through and get over. And you may benefit from more discussion as well. I’m sure you two will be able to talk through the disagreement.

    Why in the world does he like BoA? Is he crazy? Their fees are ridiculous. Silly man. He needs to come over to the dark side. Credit Unions, ftw!

    Leave a comment


    Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

    Find Amazing Vendors