spin off – do you and your SO feel similarly about God/religion?

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: as far as you and your so:
    we're on the same page w/r/t God and religion. : (230 votes)
    76 %
    we're not on the same page w/r/t God and religion. : (72 votes)
    24 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1137 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @wrkbrk:  Spirituality is a main issue in both of our lives, if we weren’t on the same page, I think things could be very difficult.

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    4656 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    We’re both non believers.

    Post # 5
    Member
    3280 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Definitly. We met at a Lutheran high school, are active in our church, and have a very clear understanding of how we will raise our children and send them to Lutheran schools. I would not marry someone who did not share my beliefs. It is a very important part to me and my family. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    4072 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I grew up going to church, but then as an adult I became an atheist. I am firm in my non-belief and enjoy studying other faith systems.

    My FI didn’t grow up with any sort of religious influence, really, so now as an adult he’s rather apathetic. He doesn’t believe in any higher power, but he isn’t fussed about it.

    So yes, at the core we share the same lack of belief. I am more passionate about it though. It’s never been a source of strife.

    I would never be able to marry a man who was a believer. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1835 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    I dated someone for about four years, our beliefs were totally different and we would often argue about that. As I grew older I realized it was too big of a difference. My DH and I are completely on the same page. We both believe in God, we are both passionate about our religion and how we will raise our children. I do, however, think that if both people can be respectful of the other that maybe a relationship could work without agreeing on religion. My ex often mocked my beliefs and that was a huge problem for us.

    Post # 8
    Member
    10495 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    No, DH is atheist while I’m a Christian.  It doesn’t negatively affect our relationship, as we still respect each other.  I think I would have a difficult time being married to a fundamentalist Christian.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1111 posts
    Bumble bee

    My FI was raised very Catholic (but he is not devout), and I was not raised anything. We both believe in being decent human beings because it is the right thing to do, so that is really all that matters to me.

    However, if my FI asked me to compromise my beliefs and change myself to suit him then I don’t think it would work out. I have expressed that I will accompany him to church the handful of times he goes a year if he wants, but I will not be converting because I don’t necessarily believe in the religion itself and it would be dishonest and disrespectful of me to do so.

    He respects my very liberal beliefs, and I respect his conservative ones. We learn from each other and how to understand each others’ points of view. Religion as a topic doesn’t really come up, so I’m not really worried about it; we’ve agreed that if we have children we will let them choose to follow what religion they like, if any, and not push them in any one direction except to be a good person.

    Post # 11
    Member
    772 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Neither of us drunk the kool-aid. Wink

    Post # 12
    Member
    10495 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    @wrkbrk:  When it comes up, it tends to be in clusters, so it’s hard to really say.  Maybe once a month on average?

    We are good about debating things, getting heated and passionate about our opinions without insulting each other.  Then we move on to talking about something else without any problem.  If one of us starts to get upset we’ll just switch the topic a bit sooner.

    It would probably be a bigger issue if we had kids, but we’re not planning on having any at this stage and we have talked about how we would deal with it if we ever do decide to have any.

    Post # 13
    Member
    10495 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    DH was also raised Catholic, so I think he finds my beliefs easier to deal with than his parents.  My denomination tends to encourage questioning, whereas when he was in Catholic school or church questions tended to be shut down.

    Post # 15
    Member
    212 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I’m a Christian and my BF is atheist.  He doesn’t mock my religion or anything like that, he is very supportive of my beliefs and I don’t try to force him to believe in my beliefs.  He wishes he believed in some sort of religion but just can’t.  It doesn’t negativly affect our relationship at all.  It does make me feel sad sometimes that he doesn’t believe in God but we are young and he has his whole life ahead of him to find something to believe in.

    Post # 16
    Member
    3959 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @wrkbrk:   We disagree, but for the same reason.   He does not believe in a god because there is no firm, visible, irrefutable proof that a god exists.

    I believe in a god because there is no firm, visible, irrefutable proof that a god exists.  To me, that is faith.  

    We respect each other, and our beliefs.  

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