Post # 1
Seeing speeches in movies or reading them here, I often see the bulk of it being about the speakers relationship with the bride or groom, whoever they’re closer with, then shoving in how lucky the other person is, good luck and congratulations. Fiance and I have been a package deal for so long, I doubt anyone who’d give a speech could speak solely about either of us without the other and I like that. I’d rather hear a speech about how you view the newlyweds as opposed to tons about one half and little about the other.
What are your thoughts? Are your speech givers friends with just one half or close to both of you? If you’ve given a speech, how was the content balanced?
Post # 3
In my opinion, stories told about the speach giver’s relationship to the bride/groom should be tied to an overarching message about the couple. The wedding, of course, is about the couple.
Post # 4
@HonoraryNerd: I think the speech should be primarily about the person you know closer, concluding with a little bit about their relationship with their spouse. The way I figure it, one person makes a speech about the groom (usually the best man), and one makes a speech about the bride (usually the Maid/Matron of Honor or father of the bride). If you’re the Maid/Matron of Honor, you can tell a teenage story about the bride but you’re pretty unlikely to know a teenage story about the groom, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Leave it to the Best Man to tell a funny story about the groom.
However, speeches should be about the bride (or groom), not the speech giver’s relationship with the bride (or groom). I’ve seen draft speeches which are just as much about the Maid/Matron of Honor (or best man) as they are about the bride (or groom) – and that’s better avoided.
Post # 5
@paula1248: I don’t know. I always feel like it’s the bride, bride, bride, bride, bride, oh yea! Here’s the groom and vice versa. I guess I don’t really see the point of crazy teenager stories unless, like @cbgg: said, it leads to something about the couple, like growing up, Steve was really limited. It was like pulling teeth trying to get him to try new things. But with Becky, it’s completely different. She’s made him want to have new experiences. Now they travel all the time and he’s been skydiving 5 times! She brings out this whole new side to him and it’s awesome.
Post # 6
@HonoraryNerd: I hate speeches in general. Eh, maybe hate is too strong but I find speech time the perfect time to get up and go to the bar. Unless the speeches are super funny, IMO no one really cares for more than 5 minutes. Some speeches just drag ON and I’m like omgsh wrap it up already.
IF we have any speeches at our wedding, which I don’t think we will, I’ll make sure they’re short and tell whomever that I’d prefer if they mention us as a couple for more than just an ending one liner.
Post # 7
- Wedding: October 2014 - Greenbrier Country Club
I think the speech should reflect the couple. <those are the best. But don’t feel any kind of way if they don’t. Not everyone is a great writer. 🙂
Post # 8
I think more about the person, with an end sort of spring board to how they are as a couple. You can tell a cute little story about the person when they were young – usually showing how they have grown, or how the relationship answers some aspect of their young lives. It is a picture of now and then, tying past to present, and looking to future.
I think, given that a maid of honour or best man are not likely to know much about the opposite spouse, if every speech were mostly about the couple, they’d end up being very general and ambiguous, more of a “love is so great” cliche than a personal speech.
Post # 9
I would be happy about either one. Of course, I would expect my friends to make an extra-effort to include their thoughts about my husband (they like him, they see he makes me happy, etc.). But I can understand that sometimes in life, you don’t always get to know that much somebody’s SO. Better friendship speeches than none at all !