Post # 1
I was reading the Ring Price and Reactions thread and was surprised that every one pretty much knew what there ring cost. As a guy, preparing to propose, I have absolutley no intention of telling my GF what the ring cost. We don’t have combined finances and I will be paying cash for the ring so there will be no financing that we will be responsible for when we are married and combine finances.
Is it unusual to not tell the girl what the ring cost? I see it as a gift, I would think it would be rude for her to ask or me to tell her. Diamond prices are fairly easy to estimate so she could certainly get a ball park if she wanted to.
In our situation her ring would be by a good amount the largest in our social circle. I am by no means wealthy but make enough and manage my money well enough to be able to spend a significant amount on a ring without breaking the bank or taking on debt.
Is there any reason to tell her? If you know what yours cost how did you find out? If yours was expensive for your social circle/area or just significantly more than you could afford on your salary, how did you react? If you don’t know what your ring cost how do you feel about that?
Post # 3
i have no idea. I think the appraisal is in the safe at our house but i’ve never looked and thats not even what he paid anyway. I can take a good guess since i do know the specs.
Post # 4
We have shared finances and talked about our budget before he bought the ring. I “helped” him pick out the setting, then he selected the diamond. I also have the appraisal and had to get it insured.
Post # 5
I do not think there is a reason to tell her if you are picking the ring out yourself. But my hubby and I picked the ring together so I knew exactly how much it cost and was there when he ordered it.
Post # 6
I know what mine cost but I don’t see it as a bad thing at all, we knew what we were willing to spend and that’s what we spent (he bought the ring entirely himself though). I don’t see a difference between knowing what my ring cost and someone receiving a kindle fire for christmas (since it is easy to know what those cost). It’s not about what the ring cost, it’s about what the ring means, so it doesn’t matter that I know how much it was. If he bought it for me without my knowledge I wouldn’t ask though.
Post # 7
@MakingHerWait: We both know exactly what our rings cost since we picked them out together. I don’t know if there’s any reason why you’d need to tell her, though. The price doesn’t really affect how I feel about it, and obviously I’d take good care of my engagement ring whether it cost $5 or $50,000.
Post # 8
@MakingHerWait: I know how much my ring costs because my husband and I shopped for it together. I was with him when he bought it and when he picked it up, so I have also seen the appraisal. I also took care of adding it to our insurance policy (need appraisal for this) so at some point I would have found out.
If you pick it out yourself and insure it before you give it to her, then there’s no reason to tell her the price. Had we gone this route, I never would have asked about price.
Post # 9
Nope, no clue. And that’s fine with me
Post # 10
@MakingHerWait: I told my husband not to spend more than x. So I know that it was less than x and I have seen the appraisal. Rings are not important to me and I could really care less. I’d rather take a nice trip.
Post # 11
I know the cost because we shopped together. I chose the setting and he selected the diamond.
Post # 12
@MakingHerWait: I know how much my ring cost becuase my FI and picked it out together.
Post # 13
I know what mine cost, because it was one of the ones I showed DH that I liked, and I have the reciept for inspection purposes (it’s inspected every 6 months).
Post # 14
I know how much he paid and how much it was appraised for and insured for and how much it would cost to replace it.
Post # 15
A follow up, for those who know, have you been asked about the price? Do you ever wish you didn’t know?
My GF’s family and friends are all from relatively small towns in the south. .5ct and smaller diamonds are certainly within the norm here. Her female friends and family members are also a little nosey and will undoubtedly ask, or atleast try to get her to tell them what it costs. Her extended family can be a bit judgemental about how other people spend there money. I feel it might be easier for her to not know and always have that deniability, “Oh, I know I definitely didn’t anything big but who was I to say no”.
ETA: Thanks for all the responses, looks like a lot of people don’t know what theirs cost.
Post # 16
Well I picked mine out so I know what it cost (the less DH has to shop, the better).
No one has ever asked me the price.