Post # 1
I think the thread “typical reasons for divorce” is interesting, but inherently negative, and I thought it would be good to have the flip-side.
Personally, I think the most important thing is checking in. As in, every now and then, going really in depth with “How are you?” I think this is how you can make sure you’re communicating, committing to your mutual happiness, and growing together.
Post # 2
Active sex life.
Thinking about if what you’re saying is kind and helpful before speaking and knowing when not to say anything.
Taking fun time together like going on vacations or weekends away.
Post # 3
Go in to marriage eyes wide open. Your marriage cirtificate doesn’t turn King Joffery to Prince Charming. You get the person who you both where every moment up to your wedding.
Post # 4
My ways of avoiding divorce:
1. Pick your battles: Seriously, the stuff I see my friends get mad at thier spouses about is mind boggling. Every time something kind of bothers me, I take a moment and ask myself if the issue at hand is *really* that big of a deal before reacting. Most times, it’s better to just leave it alone.
2. Consideration: I really make an effort to keep my spouses desires in the back of my mind when making decisions and make sure that whatever I am doing, buying, saying, etc is considerate to them as well.
3. Just have sex already: Some nights I don’t feel like it, but I do anyhow. DH’s sex drive is higher than mine, but I know that sex for him is his way of feeling close to me. I’ve never regretted pushing through that “I don’t feel like it” moment to have sex… it ends up being worth it 😉
Finally, I am lucky to have a spouse that tends to treat me in the same regard as I treat him. We’re pretty compatible, and sometimes, that’s just luck.
Post # 5
theshannondee: Oh yes, sex is definitely important, as is talking about it.
Misswhowedding: Lol I love the reference! Yeah, I really don’t get people who think marriage is a way to fix major personality flaws.
Post # 6
Be on the same page about money BEFORE the wedding. This is our issue, but we’re figuring it out now and not later when there are joint bills to pay.
Post # 7
Taking care of each others’ intimacy needs & speaking to their love language. This goes both ways.
Post # 8
ladyamalthea: give in once in a while. you dont always have to be right. like OP said. pick your battles.
active sex life and open mind. tired isnt a good enough exscuse and i have to remind myself that too!lol
having a life outside of marriage. doing things without each other, seeing friends without each other. having goals for yourself not just each other.
along with having time together. never stop dating 😉 or some type of hobby together. whether dinner or a movie or some racketball. try new things together.