(Closed) spinoff: How do you feel about porn as a woman?

posted 6 years ago in Intimacy
  • poll: above question
    I don't have a strong opinion on the subject : (20 votes)
    4 %
    I enjoy porn : (104 votes)
    20 %
    I am okay with my partner enjoying porn : (83 votes)
    16 %
    I dont watch porn and would not be okay with my partner watching porn : (36 votes)
    7 %
    It does not effect the way I view myself and my body : (77 votes)
    15 %
    It has hurt my self esteem and/or effected my sex life negatively : (21 votes)
    4 %
    It objectifies/exploits women : (44 votes)
    9 %
    It sets unrealistic expectations : (61 votes)
    12 %
    It may set unrealistic expectations, but this does not effect me, I know it's not real : (69 votes)
    13 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4693 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I don’t feel comfortable with my SO watching porn without me, but if he wanted to watch it together it would be something I’d be willing to explore.

    Post # 4
    Member
    13101 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    DH and I both watch porn – sometimes together, sometimes separately.  Although the women in porn look pretty much nothing like me, I don’t care because I know my DH finds me incredibly sexy anyway.  I could see how porn could set unrealistic expectations for some but I’ve never found this to be an issue as DH and I can both recognize that porn isn’t real life.

    And OMG those nails! 🙂

    Post # 5
    Member
    2065 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    OMG those nails! Seriously. Ouch.

    We don’t watch it together, but I’ve watched in the past and I don’t care if he watches now and then.

    Post # 6
    Member
    5273 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I enjoy it & find it a huge turn on.

    We only watch it together, but rarely. I would say I’m def into it more then my husband because the times we have watched it together it was my idea, lol.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1101 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I didn’t vote bc nothing really was for me.

    Sometimes we put it on and then get freaky lol But it in no way has it “helped” our relationship, we’ve never been in the position to have needed porn to help it.  I’m also not against it and it does not alter the way I feel about myself or my confidence. If anything it boosts it bc I know I’m way better looking than the chicks on the screen (not to be cocky at all, but really I’ve yet to see a porn star I thought was beautiful or even pretty) We also don’t watch it often, the last time we did was in December. (yes I remember when lol)

     

    Edit: I voted I enjoy porn….lol (don’t judge me Cool)

    Post # 8
    Member
    9630 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    We like it, we watch it together sometimes.  But only naked in bed because after a few minutes we’re so hot we turn it off and get busy with each other.  We’ve never gotten to the end of one.  We think of it as a turn-on in the same way as sexy lingerie and toys, just another way to enjoy sex with each other.  Sometimes we make love and sometimes we fuck like wild animals.  Depends on our mood.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1101 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Sunfire:  okay your bedroom sounds alot like our bedroom haha! We just turn it on to get it started, then it’s off and our action starts!

    Post # 10
    Member
    9630 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @JlovesM:  Yep, we’re always more into each other than anything else.  We do different things whenever, there’s no set thing.  Usually it would be if it was a rainy weekend afternoon, and we both just suddenly look at each other, and it’s like, “Woo-hoo, extra time together and we’re staying inside – so let’s get naked!”  On an everyday basis we make love (I differentiate between types of sex, haha) every single night and a lot of mornings, with no accoutrements.  On weekday mornings, no time – just quickies. 

    I don’t understand why porn would make anyone feel insecure about their body, hard to wrap my mind around that one.  It’s just a movie on a screen, like any other movie.  Bella doesn’t make me feel insecure either.

    Post # 11
    Member
    4275 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I enjoy it myself, I use it when I am feeling the urge but my mind goes every which way so I need something to get me going. I am not attracted (sexually) to women, but I only really watch girl on girl. And yes the long nails tend to distract me… but I have thought about it and would have a fantasy about doing that in front of the FI…

    I know the FI will watch it when I am not around. It does not bother me in the least. He watches it for the same reason I do. I do not feel threatened by these girls and I do not feel like I need to look like them. It does give me ideas to try though.

    I see it as just a fantasy. Nothing more.

    I was roomies once with a performer…she enjoys her job very much. She never had to do anything she was uncomfortable with and she got paid a decent amount. The only downside for her was maintaining a serious relationship while still doing it, because most men would not feel comfortable with that.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1030 posts
    Bumble bee

    It honestely doesn’t bother me one bit.

    I had to go on his emails to check a tracking number for a delivery and saw that he’d signed up to some website. It just made me laugh.

    Hey, if I’m not in the mood, I’d rather he get it from there than physically with another girl!

    Post # 13
    Member
    5548 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I would never let another person in my bedroom, on the screen or off it. No way, ever. And DH feels the same, he did watch some as a teenage boy (because honestly, there are very few who haven’t) but he hasn’t in a long time and has no desire to. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    2759 posts
    Sugar bee

    I was actually really interested to find out what FI watches. He’s not big on talking about it and he gets really skeeved out by me knowing what he’s watched, but the one time I stumbled upon some history it was very educational – I had no idea he was interested in a certain thing, and once I learned he was I started incorporating it into our bedroom life and he definitely enjoyed it (:

    I can’t get into video porn myself, but I’m big on erotica. I don’t care if he watches because I know he’s having the real sex with me. But I do know in other relationships it can be harmful, so I think it’s not a black/white topic. And overall, I think porn definitely sets people up with seriously unrealistic expectations about sex.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1101 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Sunfire:  I don’t know how it makes anyone feel insecure either, you are beautiful as you are, and to me…if you say it makes you feel insecure, well there’s probably a 99.9% chance you were already that way, so don’t blame it on the porn. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    4275 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @MissCalifornia:  Yes, I was also curious to see what he watches as well! I would also find ways to incorporate it somehow, not all of the things on there though haha. I do try to hide my lesbian porn for some reason….I know its silly, but I would be embarrassed if he knew thats all I was into porn wise! So yes I can see why your guy gets alittle skeeved about it haha

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