Spinoff: If you had married at 20 years old…

posted 6 years ago in 30 Something
  • poll: If you got married in your teens or early twenties...
    I'd be divorced : (681 votes)
    44 %
    I'd be happily married still : (339 votes)
    22 %
    Life would be better : (41 votes)
    3 %
    Life would be worse : (318 votes)
    21 %
    I'd be UNhappily married still : (159 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 3
    1361 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I would probably be living in a teeny tiny aparment in NYC, and I probably wouldn’t have a Ph.D.

    Post # 4
    7431 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    Ok, I’m not quite 30 yet, but I am going to answer anyway!! I dated a guy from 16-20, I was certain we would me married and live happily ever after. Had we married, I would be either totally miserable, or divorced. I started dating my husband right before I turned 21, we got married right before I turned 26, and I am so glad that it happened the way it did!! My ex was not right for me, and my husband is perfect for me. 

    Post # 5
    1562 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Divorced.  And hopefully somehow I found my H and married him anyway!

    Post # 6
    5977 posts
    Bee Keeper

    I would either have been divorced or extremely unhappy. In my early 20s, I was with my ex, and we were talking about getting married. Then one day, I woke up and realize that he’s not at all the type of guy I wanted to be with let alone marry. He was lazy and unmotivated…never wanted to do anything except sit at home. I got fed up with it and broke up with him my senior year of college…and thank goodness.

    Post # 7
    871 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @MadameTussaud:  If I had married my Boyfriend or Best Friend that I had at age 20 I would be living in a small apartment, he’d probably be cheating on me and I would be the only one working/bringing in money. He would be hanging out with his friends all the time and ignoring me. Or more likely, we’d be divorced. 

    Luckily at 27 I am marrying a fabulous guy who has a wonderful job that allows me to work part time, we live in a beautiful 4 bedroom home, I drive a nice car, have a dog that we love, he spends a lot of time with me, he has a wonderful family and is someone I am 100% comfortable around, can say anything, wonderful sex life, he’s funny/entertaining, we just love being together. We have very similar goals financially/family wise and just click. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world every day!! 

    Post # 8
    1595 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I didn’t have any *serious* relationships or anything that lasted beyond 6 months at that age, but knowing how much fun I was having, I know that I would have missed out on having the best days of my life with my girlfriends and just being young, single, crazy and carefree!!

    Post # 9
    2401 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Married to a guy with no ambition, no good taste, and fighting over getting basic cable.

    Post # 10
    5758 posts
    Bee Keeper


    Post # 11
    5096 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    A) Living near my hometown, feeling trapped and unable to pursue my life goals,


    B) Living where I do now, pursuing my life goals, but with a husband who was emotionally and socially dependent on me to an unhealthy degree

    Post # 12
    1048 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Definitely divorced. I wasn’t anywhere close to being emotionally ready for marriage when I was in my early 20s. Plus, I dated pretty good guys but I never had any serious feelings for any of them – we wouldn’t have lasted a year. If my husband and I had met when I was younger, I still don’t think we would have made it.

    Post # 13
    333 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I started dating my guy at 18. I am now almost 27. We are super strong and happy together. We have literally grown up together…but we had 2 big rough patches many years ago when we were in early 20s and worked VERY hard at getting through them. I think not being married helped because we had the choice to walk out more easily than going through a divorce. But we fought to stay together, without any kind of “we are married, we made vows, we HAVE to get through this.” It was more like “Im young, I can date others, we’re having problems, but I really love you and want to give it every chance I have.”

    We seriously just loved dating and each other’s company and building our lives separately but together. I was never in a rush to be married. So now that we are getting married, it’s exciting. And a lot of our friends are excited bc theyve grown up with us too 🙂 I am really lucky it worked out this way, and that he is still the type of guy I want this many years later. But I am super super glad we didn’t get married early. We definitely had the money and stable careers to at that point as well. But looking back, I just think life was so much more fun this way 🙂

    Post # 14
    3943 posts
    Honey bee

    I would be miserable.

    Post # 15
    5786 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I’d probably be happy, I’m still friends with that ex.

    Post # 16
    778 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Married to my DH! But I’m glad we both did some growing up together before tying the knot. Otherwise it might have been a bumpy first few years of marriage. Not to mention that I’m not sure how a wedding and marriage would have affected my studies.

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