(Closed) SPINOFF: Kids at bridal showers

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Kids at bridal showers:
    I have been to a bridal shower where small children were present : (37 votes)
    58 %
    No way, bridal showers are adult functions : (27 votes)
    42 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2098 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Where do you live?

     

    Depends on your social circle. Most showers are only adults but I have been to a few where kids are there & found it weird. But sometimes the host or whomever think its fine if they are little. I personally do not because it should be about the guest of honor and kids have a way of making that not happen just by being kids. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    633 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    It depends on the hosts…some circles are open to children attending everything, while some are not. Every shower I’ve been to with kids, they were generally well behaved or if not, the parents handled it. The only problem I see with your situation is that you said you ended up babysitting, instead of the parents handling their own kids.

    I try to not bring my daughter to everything, but sometimes I have to, or I won’t be able to go. In those cases, my friends would rather have me come with her than not come at all, but I know a lot of people are not as accomodating. We actually recently disappointed a huge group of friends by NOT bringing her to a wedding with us!

    Post # 5
    Member
    983 posts
    Busy bee

    I’ve taken my daughter to baby/bridal showers. She’s well behaved in social environments.  In those cases, her name was on the invite also. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    6015 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I can’t even fathom the amount of bridal/baby showers or engagment parties I’ve been brought to growing up, there were always a ton of kids there.  I would think some of these kids are related to whomever the shower is for, it’s a family event.  In our family it gives time for family members to visit and have a good time.  We always had games and things set up so the kids were busy too.  At my bridal shower the kids were upstairs playing Dance Dance Revolution, or coloring.  I want to say there were at least 15kids at my shower.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1083 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Only inviting teens to my shower. My future niece is 13, her cousin – 13, and my boss’s daughters who are 13 and 15. I think they’re old enough to enjoy the shower. I don’t think a shower is a place for SMALL children. Not entirely appropriate, unless there was no other choice (no babysitter, etc.)

    Post # 9
    Member
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @cmbr: I hosted a baby shower for my MOH back in December. Someone brought her devil child and he proceeded to get the lovely chocolate fondue I made all over my silk curtains (this after I repeatedly asked him to play in the kitchen and not on top of my figgin curtains)…so that was awesome.

    Kids have been to most showers I been to, but this is the first time it’s really been a problem.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2098 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @cmbr:  I don’t have kids & sometimes I’m not sure I want them. I get where you are coming from. 

    If the child’s name is on the invite, then by all means its ok to bring them. But I don’t feel just because someone has kids they should automatically get to bring them, but again… It depends on the other guests and host. Someone said they had kids at their shower & they were upstairs playing games. I wouldn’t even be ok with that but if the bride personally is then, I don’t see the issue. 

    Can you ask if there will be kids? 

     

    One shower will have young ladies there… 11-12 years old. That’s fine with me. Both know how to behave themselves. But I specifically requested (when asked if I wanted young children), no young kids. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    2098 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @phillybride61513:  I hope his parents offered to clean or replace your curtains? 

     

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @Coral99:  No, I didn’t find it until about 2 weeks after the shower. I was (SOMEHOW) able to clean it and it’s fine so I wasn’t about to call the mother and give her what-for.

    Post # 14
    Member
    5423 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I think it depends on the people/event.  Me personally am not a fan.  My teenage SIL brought her 2 babies under 2 to my shower brunch in a restaurant, ate and left within an hour. Neither she nor MIL told my mother or MOH (hosts) they were coming.   

    Post # 15
    Member
    495 posts
    Helper bee

    Give the kids a game or activity to do. Bring a board game with you if you don’t trust the host to keep them entertained! Maybe something from your childhood or something unfamiliar to them so it’ll keep their interest. Set it up in a corner away from the main activity.

    If one child is particularly heinous, don’t be afraid to tell their parent, “Suzie is getting in the way of guests/sticking her fingers in the cake/crying uncontrollably, and I don’t want to be mean about it, but it’s really distracting. Can you help?”

    Post # 16
    Member
    6015 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    If they are there, it’s kind of alot to ask , I’m only guessing from the descriptions, small kids to sit around and talk and watch other people open presents.  Can the hostess of your bridal shower ask one of your FSIL to take the kids into the basement or another room and play so they don’t disrupt the party?  I mean what is she  going to say “NO”, and their her kids so if she has to watch her own children she might not bring them.

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