(Spinoff!) Will your FMIL be with you on the wedding morning?

posted 3 years ago in Family
  • poll: Where will your FMIL be the morning of the wedding?
    She will be with the girls getting ready. : (80 votes)
    36 %
    She will be with her son/daughter the morning of. : (58 votes)
    26 %
    She will be with neither. : (62 votes)
    28 %
    Other! : (21 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 3
    8680 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I’m paying for my own hair & makeup [obv], as well as my bms, my mother & fmil.. so yeah, she’ll be hanging out with us the morning of!

    I really don’t mind though, I really adore it.. and they will be coming out a day ahead of schedule to help decorate the venue so I’m very grateful for that.

    Post # 4
    1441 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I assume she’ll be in her hotel room….

    Post # 5
    114 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    My husband and I got ready at the same hotel just in two seperate suites. My MIL came and went between the two rooms as she desired.

    Post # 6
    1112 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    That is so nasty! I’m so glad you’re asking her to spend that time with you!
    I however,, did not want my mother in law hanging out with us before the ceremony. She gave DH and I a very angry speech the day before because she believed some nasty rumours about us, and I really wasn’t over it by then. She spent the morning getting herself and her daughter (a bridesmaid) ready, which was unfortunate anyways because it meant SIL couldn’t spend that time with te rest of us either. They were only like… 300 feet away from the rest of us though.

    Post # 7
    6048 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @Jw1724:  Mine got ready with her sisters she doesn’t see often.  I just wanted to say how kind it is of you to see what is going on with the other daughter-in-law and how your taking your FMIL’s feelings into consideration 😀 

    Post # 8
    677 posts
    Busy bee

    My FMIL will be getting ready in her own house. FI wants his dad around while he’s getting ready, and she can’t stand his father. I don’t want her anywhere near me that morning, since she’ll do nothing but cause me stress. Also, neither of us need her negativity.

    Post # 9
    1838 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    nope. i invited her to get her hair and/or makeup done with us in the morning, but she didn’t want to (which i was happy about).

    Post # 10
    1068 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    @Jw1724:  We’re having a wedding weekend with lodging on-site, so she’ll be included as much as she is interested, but I suspect that both moms will also have their own extended families and friends that they want to hang out with.  She’s definitely welcome, though!  We get along quite well and I’d love to have her there.

    Post # 11
    487 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    @Jw1724:  I have 2 FMILs and neither of them will be with me. Just my MOH, BMs, and my mom. 

    Post # 12
    4043 posts
    Honey bee

    @Jw1724:  While it sounds like you FSIL (or FBIL’s wife) has been quite rude to your FMIL, it doesn’t seem like your FBIL has helped. He could have called his mother, he could have influenced the situation of where there daughter stayed and he could have included his mother in the wedding plans.

    That aside, it is nice that you would like to include your FMIL.

    I tried to include my DH’s mother as much as possible. We actually hosted my bridal shower and the rehearsal dinnner at her house (she insisted) and we had her go with us to the venue for a walk through. She was absolutely giddy with excitement and emotions throughout the whole process. DH is her oldest son, and she lives in the same town as us (my family does not). She even went with me to my dress fittings (and cried each time) because I didn’t have any family to go. I was very happy to include her in the process.

    On the morning of the wedding, she was not with us though. She helped DH with a few things, but we were at the salon getting our hair done. My mother was not at the salon either, just the BMs because she helped babysit the flower girls.

    Post # 13
    2167 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    She’ll be in the hotel room with the rest of us!!!

    Post # 15
    357 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    We had breakfast with her at the hotel. Then she hung with her family, I went to shower and pick up flowers and get to the venue. Husband went to get lunch with friends. She didn’t get ready with us at the venue. I adore her, but we didnt have a large room and she wasnt getting her hair done so she stayed at the hotel until a shuttle picked her up (I guess – maybe she went for lunch or something, but she wasn’t with us). As far as I know she didn’t mind.

    I had invited her to go dress shopping with me and she was going to come up, but then had some dental work and was in too much pain, unfortunately. My SIL is married but didnt have a traditional wedding with a dress or anything, so I was hoping MIL could have that experience if she wanted to, but it didn’t work out.


    Post # 16
    1286 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Aw I feel bad for you FMIL you FBILs wife sounds so unfair:( DH and I got suites only a few doors apart the night before the big day. So my mom came and so did his. She kind of went back and forth between my room and his. She was helping my SIL get ready in our room (bridal party) and bawling happy tears seeing her sons look so handsome and BIL was the Best Man. It worked out perfrctly as nobody felt left out of the getting ready plans. 

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