SPINOFF: Would you be put off by this?

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
8475 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I wouldn’t do a darn thing and wait to be asked by the bride. 

Post # 6
Member
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i would wait for the bride or groom to officially ask.

Post # 7
Member
474 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Maybe she’s just scatty. One of our groomsmen only discovered his role when he RSVPd on the wedding website and there was information about the wedding party. I assumed my DH had told him but apparently he’d forgotten to actually ask and just assumed he know.

Thankfully the guy in question is as laid back as the groom amd it was all fine. I don’t think it’s something to be put off by especially if they aren’t actively planning yet.

Post # 8
Member
10457 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

@Rubbs:  Yep. Exactly that. 

Post # 9
Member
474 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Also, unless you don’t want to be a bridesmaid, I really don’t see the problem.It’s a bit odd but I’d say that’s it.

Post # 10
Member
4499 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Umm I’m not a BM until the bride asks me to be.

Post # 11
Member
8044 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

I don’t get why you’re upset. It doesn’t even sound like they’re planning the wedding actively yet. I guess she just hasn’t gotten around to asking people. Maybe she shouldn’t have shared with people who she wants in the wedding, but I don’t see the big deal. It’s not like she expected you to do something and then got mad when you didn’t do it (because you didn’t even know you were a BM), right? Unless I’m totally missing something here…

Post # 12
Member
2612 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

Yeah, I would feel a little unsure about it unless I was asked by the bride herself. But maybe she really assumed that it was just a given.

Post # 13
Member
1257 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Wait until the bride personally asks you.

Post # 14
Member
12263 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

@lindseyl06:  Haha, I’m TOTALLY guilty of that!

I just assumed my SIL would be a BM, and she was like “Wait, what? Why?”

We didn’t know eachother very well… But she’s my sister now, so I definitely wanted her to be a BM then!

Post # 15
Member
1550 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

yes my sister did this. my mom started talking to me about bridesmaid dress and i’m like um she never asked me! “oh she didn’t well i’ll tell her to” but she never did.

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