Post # 1
Ok guys so lately I’ve felt that SO has been warming up to the idea of marriage but now i’m not so sure.
For example, people constantly spell his last name wrong and he said to me “you’ll see how it feels when it’s your last name too”. I almost fainted when he said that but I kept my cool. And also he’s taken to going into Kay’s when we’re at the mall and picking up their brochure to take home as “research”. And a couple of weeks ago he said that he wanted to trade in a gold chain that he had in order to buy a bracelet for $3,000…I looked at him and said there are much better things to spend your money on then a bracelet to which he responds “oh like a little engagement ring?”
BUT then the other day we were having a conversation about something-I can’t recall exactly what- and he says I love you dearly but I’m having such a hard time with this marriage thing. WTF!? I feel like all the wind got taken out of my sails. I’m so sad and feel like we’re back at step one. What do yovu guys think is going on??? I don’t understand his commitment phobia because we live together and have a baby together and he provides for us and does everything as a husband so why the split personality??
Post # 3
It sounds like he is doing more pro-marriage than anti-marriage stuff . .. . Maybe he was just having a bad day. Guys have emotions and feelings that go up and down like we do sometimes . . . maybe he just let an uncensored comment out of his mouth. It was perhaps how he felt in the moment, but I would pay attention to what he actually *does* in terms of his actions, not just his words here.
How much have you been talking about marriage to him, and how long have you been together? Since you already have a baby together, you probably should talk about where things are going and what the long-term goals are for the relationship if you haven’t already.
Post # 4
I agree with the PP – he looks like he’s actually DOING a lot more to get a proposal together than many guys do. many simply talk the talk, but your BF is walking the walk. He had a moment of frustration, maybe he got dashed in reserving a place for the proposal, he heard someone else talking about the stress of big weddings, etc. Or he could have just been stressed overall and planning to get married may have just seemed too much at the moment.
Try not to stress, give him a little space, and I’m sure he’ll continue to come through for you.
Post # 5
I agree with pp and this kinda reminds me of a story of a couple of friends of mine.
so my friends decided that they were ready to start trying to have a baby. they were both SO excited about it. THEN she gets pregnant and suddenly she’s upset and spends 2 days crying!
The reality of it all kinda hit her and even though she really wanted to have a baby and was ready it still hit her like that.
I know it’s not exactly the same but I think you SO is obviously looking into taking the steps to get married BUT there may be times/moments that hit kinda hits him in the face and he’s like WHOA…
I wouldn’t take it as anything more than that… we all do that with one thing or another… even when it’s what we really really want. I think that he’s just comfortable enough and trusts you enough to be able to share those things with you… which that is a good thing! 😉
Post # 6
Thank you ladies! My waiting ego is very fragile and any negative comments at this point make me feel like it’s never going to happen and that I should just give up. But I know he’s getting there slowly but surely, it’s been 7yrs. And we have talked about marriage but have never been on the same page. Crossing my fingers that 7 is my lucky year and it happens!!!