(Closed) Starting Over…advice needed

posted 5 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

1. yes! even if your period is regular, that doesn’t mean your cycle is exactly the ‘average’. you might be someone who ovulates early and has a long luteal phase, or ovulates late and has a short luteal phase. you don’t really know for sure without charting.

2. temperature adjusters are not perfect and i don’t suggest using them regularly. how wierd is your schedule? if 5 is the earliest you have to get up, then just schedule your temping for 5am every day and go back to sleep afterward on the days you get to sleep in. 

i work overnights and i temp at 4pm even though i usually wake up at 7pm… because some days i may need to wake up earlier.

3. best days are three days before ovulation up to one day after ovulation. 

we use pre-seed. we haven’t gotten our BFP yet, but it works really well as a lubricant. DH really enjoys the feel of it, so we use it during our not fertile times also.

Post # 4
Member
2227 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@Mrs.Maeby:  1. I think it’s always worth while to chart since it gives you an idea of when you actually do ovulate (rather than a range) and know if, for whatever reason, you are late one month, what is going on. If you’re not crazy about alarms, it’s a good idea to at least keep track of your cm (cervical mucus).

2. There are mixed opinions on the temp converters. My first chart was a bit off the first time since I temped at different times but still very readable.

3. I dunno… Haven’t really looked into anything else. Maybe start taking your pre-natals? I would imagine pre-seed is only useful if lubricant is a must for you guys during your fertile window. Consider your cervical mucus & personal lubrication (TMI?)?

Post # 5
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

right. what @FutureMrsRugbee said. Your own CM is best, but PreSeed is good if you don’t produce much CM on your own. If you do have enough CM, then you shouldn’t need PreSeed.

I don’t produce much CM. I rarely have anything marked on my chart for it because I can rarely produce enough to even check it’s consistency.

Post # 6
Member
2227 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@rosworms:  I don’t know why I’m in such an invasive place right now; the first thing that poped into my mind is “Do you check internally?”. Don’t answer that! It’s none of my business.

Sometimes I find things internally that I would have missed going to the bathroom (IT SNEAKS OUT!). OK OVERSHARING OVER!!

 

Post # 7
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@MrsRugbee:  i do. LOL i actually had “no matter how much i dig in there” originally in my post and deleted it because i didn’t want to gross anyone out. 

Post # 8
Member
2227 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@rosworms:  AHAHHA! This is what the TTC board does to bees! >_<

Post # 9
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@Mrs.Maeby:  *hugs*  First off, I’m so sorry that you’ve joined this horrible club.  I’ve had 6 and 3 of those were lines but very very faint (the other 3 had positive digis so definitely confirmed).  It doesn’t matter if it was a false positive or not, you probably started planning for that baby the moment you saw that line.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.

As to the rest:  I agree with the other ladies, I’d chart.  Your flow might be like clockwork, but that doesn’t mean that you know when you ovulate so that you are timing things right.  I fought against charting for so very long and once  I finally did, I have been so much more calm and in control feeling.  Personally for me, I work shifts, so I don’t set an alarm.  I just simply temp the moment I wake up as long as it’s been at least 3 hours of solid sleep.  If I have any questions about the accuracy of the temp, I noted it in my chart, but I don’t adjust the temps.  My charts have ended up being pretty clear despite temps taken at all times.  I tried to use the adjuster one month to see what would happen and where it was clear when the temps were left alone, the pattern became vastly UNCLEAR when I tried to adjust things.

My hubby and I like preseed and while I can’t say for sure that it’s helped us get pregnant or not, it’s very helpful as a lubricant and like a pp, we use it any time in the cycle not just fertile times.  If I have a lot of CM going on then we usually will skip it.  I tend to get a bunch of ewcm the week leading up to ovulation.

As for the right timing, my cycles are always different so for me, even with temping, I’m never sure when it’s going to be until after the fact (although the last few months I’ve had cramping that’s given me a clue that I’m ovulating), so we’ve just stuck to every other day throughout my cycle.  That’s worked well for us as far as getting me pregnant.  lol  Now just to figure out how to get a baby to stick for 9 months….

Post # 12
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@Mrs.Maeby:  It truly is.  Expect the sadness to come in waves.  It’s normal and please please do allow yourself whatever time you need to grieve.  Don’t let anyone tell you when you should be ‘over it’.  If you need someone to talk to, please feel free to pm me.

Post # 14
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@Mrs.Maeby:  They are definitely missing the point.  It’s not that we both can’t try again, it’s that we LOST A CHILD!  People who haven’t had a miscarriage just don’t understand in my experience and even sometimes people who have will forget what it’s like.  My husband gets comments all the time about how it’s a good thing because he can just enjoy life.  UGH!  He responds to them with “Ok all that aside, think back to the first time you held your child”.  He says all of them get googly eyed and then realize what a stupid thing they just said.

Post # 16
Member
1285 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m really very sorry about what you are going through! The great thing about weddingbee is the supportive ladies who have been there and can identify…I’m really happy you found one that is helping.  

If you don’t want to temp, you can do a little “cheating”. Get Ovulation Preditor Kits (OPKs), the week before you think you will O, start using them and temping (to get your baseline), the temp for a few days after O to ensure it rises, indicating you did indeed O. I hear Clear Blue Easy makes the best OPK, but I use the internet cheapies from Amazon and they worked well.

Honestly, I take my temp when I wake up, that could be at 530am during the week and 7am on the weekend. I don’t adjust it, my charts don’t look too wonky, and I really only care to use it to ensure O so it is only one week that matters.

I hope you don’t mind oversharing, but since you asked about pre-seed…I think your own CM is best (and yes, I check internally but only once a day to leave as much in there as possible, I don’t make a great deal). Since my DH and I BD daily from CD 10-25, things start taking a little longer and pre-seed is great to make it enjoyable for everyone.

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