Post # 1
ok question for all you bees. We are having a destination wedding, sorta. We will be getting married in the BVI’s. His whole family leaves there, but of course mine doesn’t. So I was wondering my family of course we will be sending STD cards too, but should I send them to us?
Before you fully answer, keep this in mind, the BVI’s you don’t have mailboxes, it all goes to the central office and you walk up and ask if you have any mail, so if I do send STD I will have 30 STD cards sitting at the post office for random people to pick up. Also, wedding’s done there are much more laid-back, a lot less stress and NONE of the crazy weddiness that goes on up here, which is why i can’t wait to have it down there, pick a cake sure, that one please. No planing no searching for flavors, just a I will take that one the day before the wedding.
Let me know what you bees think.
Post # 3
Save-The-Date Cards are not a requirement, but rather a useful tool for helping the couple make sure their guests know their wedding date before they have a chance to make other plans or so they have advanced notice to start making plans in the case of a destination wedding. So, you are not obligated to send everyone STDs–just those whom you think might need the extra “push” (i.e. your side of the family and friends who will have to make extra-special arrangements to plan a trip to the BVI). The BVI side will probably never know they didn’t get one, espeically when you send them the actual invite. Just be sure to send an invite to everyone who received an STD. 🙂
Post # 4
avdillard0110 is totally right! send them to those who need to make travel arrangements, or need advance notice, and skip sending them to the family in BVI.
Post # 5
I doubt they will even know what is! I sent Save-The-Date Cards to FIs family in the UK and they didn’t even really know what it was! It is really just North Americans who do them so I would forgo the hassle and extra costs! They are all local also so they don’t really have to plan for accommodations or anything!
Post # 6
Thanks all, that is kinda what I figured, but I thought I would ask you guys! I figured they would all look at it a bit strangely. That will nicely cut down on the STD’s which will be good.
Post # 7
Whether someone is local or not is moot. Being local doesn’t change the fact that guests need advance notice to schedule vacations from work, make travel arrangements, etc. That type of thing is not strictly for out of the area guests at all, despite what many believe. Basically, anyone you intend to invite should receive a save the date card. If you don’t know if you want to invite them, don’t send a save the date.
Post # 8
In general I would probably agree, but the point you missed is that most of these people are on the island, as in 8 miles long, no travel required. And most of them will be off that day from work anyways. And I agree with Future Mrs. Martin that most of them probably wouldn’t even know what the STD was for.
The island is so laid back the last wedding I went to for a local they didn’t even have invites to begin with, it was just word of mouth inviting. So things function down there a bit differently.
But thanks for the advice and I will keep it in mind. *:)
Post # 9
Even so, most employers require more than 6 weeks notice for vacations. Wedding invites are sent out at the 6 week mark, so everyone needs equal advance notice just to be on the safe side. Also, some people lead really busy lives while others don’t, regardless if they are local or not, so the advance notice will be appreciated in that case. Either way, they are not required no matter what anyone says, and in ‘real life” outside of the wedding blogs and other websites, most people have never seen a save the date card so they would not know what it was, even when it specifically says ‘formal invite to follow.’ Do whatever works best for you.