Post # 1
Hi everyone! I’ve been a lurker on the boards here for awhile, but I finally have a question.
My boyfriend and I (of 8 years) were about to get engaged (he has a ring picked out and everything). But one of my friends got engaged last month, so he postponed the engagement. He picked out the ring in August but didn’t want to steal her thunder and was waiting for the perfect time to propose to me so that there would be some suprise in it for me 🙂 . We have talked about how we want to get married, so that is how I know.
However, he just told some of his friends of his plan, and some of them are telling him that he’s just trying to steal the other guy’s thunder and should wait a couple more months before he proposes. I was completely shocked that guys were telling him that he was being rude. Some of his friends think it’s perfect, but others had a lot of not so kind things to say.
What do you think?
Post # 3
Oh whateverrrrr, this whole “stealing thunder” thing is silly.
I don’t know about you, but I’m at an age where EVERYONE around me is getting engaged. I know like four people who were engaged within about a month of me, and we all were happy for each other and congratulated each other because we’re not fourteen.
Post # 4
I think the whole “stealing thunder” thing is petty and so high school. You’re allowed to be happy at the same time that other people are happy.
Post # 5
He’s not stealing anyone’s thunder at this point — that’s crazy! He was really thoughtful to delay the engagement when he did, but that’s enough — you guys need to get on with your lives, too!
Post # 6
I don’t think he is being rude. The only day a bride and groom get is their wedding day. I don’t really understand the whole “you’re stealing their thunder” thing.
Post # 7
Is there some kind of algorithm for when it becomes ok again? Like does a certain amount of thunder dissipate every month?
He should not be waiting for these bs reasons
Post # 8
@LGenz: Haha, a thunder allowance!
Woops, all the thunder for this month is gone! Better wait til there’s more thunder around for meeee.
Post # 9
I agree with you guys definitely. It’s just that now I’m nervous that my best friend will be mad at me.
The fact that some of his friends were literally yelling at him the other night for even thinking of doing so made me think that his friends are petty, but I also had to double think it.
Post # 10
- Wedding: June 2017 - Vegas Wedings
Bizarre. So how long are you 2 supposed to wait? Till next year so they have this whole calendar year as “their” engagement year? I can sorta understand waiting days and idealing weeks, others would disagree on waiting at all, but now a month isnt long enough… C’mon. Tell these guys to grow up and that no one owns time periods.
Post # 11
I never get this “stealing my thunder” kind of thing.
I got engaged within weeks of three other women that I know and I can’t recall a single catty thing said by anyone.
Post # 12
I have said this before and I will say it again. Your friend is neither Thor nor Zeus and thus has no thunder to steal.
You should not change your life plans on a friend. They have been engaged for a month. They get the one day for everyone to be excited they are engaged and one wedding day. They don’t get to call dibs on the year.
Post # 13
Thanks everyone! I really appreciate it. Has anyone else been through this though? I mean like someone has specifically called you out and said “you’re stealing their thunder”
Post # 14
Post # 15
@Laceymae: I don’t know who he’s talking to but its sounds like these people are being rediculous. Just get engaged! Its not like he’s proposing at their wedding/engagement party, jeeze.
Post # 16
they have had more than enough time to bask in their engaged glory… its your turn. they will deal.
i actually would have loved if a good friend got engaged when i did. instead i came home from my engagement to 2 frieds having ended relationships. there was no one to gush with for a long time :/