- 5 years ago
- Wedding: January 2013
If any of you bees have been following my story you know that I have been struggling with my (step) daughter. I just refer to her as my daughter since I raise her. I mention step because its about to get complicated. She has had many issues, outburst, violence, anger, crying fits, lying, getting others into trouble. I have always believed that at the root of all these behaviors is the fact that her and her sister were abandoned by their real mother.
She told my now Darling Husband when they were seperating that she never wanted to really be married or have kids. She gave the kids to Darling Husband and never looked back. In the first few years after their seperation she would call occasionally, rarely, and talk to the girls. Always stating in her own way that she didnt have time for the girls or the money to visit them.
Over the years the calls have dropped off, usually around the holidays, maybe a package here and there for a birthday, they havent seen her in 4 years.
My darling daughter has now begun therapy and we have been making in roads into her problems with being abandoned, Darling Husband trying to make up for it and actually making it worse, but now we are getting better. We are in family counseling and she is in individual therapy with 3 therapist. Its been going extremely well…until today.
Her mother notified my Mother-In-Law that she will be coming to visit the girls July 9, the day before the youngest ones 9th birthday. I feel all of the work we have been doing is about to go down the drain. I feel like her mother never had any interest before. She hasnt been there for the struggles and the tears and holidays and events at school.
Im really ticked that she is going to show up the day before little darling daughters birthday and we wont be with her on her birthday. Little daughter doesnt care if she ever sees her mother again. Its the oldest who has such confusion and problems with her mother.
Darling Husband and I have full custody of the girls. His ex wife has visitation and she has never used it. Now after all the struggle and all the therapy and moving forward she is going to show up for a week and then be gone again. My darling daughter is going to be devastated when she leaves again and likely cause a set back in her therapy.
Im angry as hell. Not at my darling daughter or even her wanting to see her mother I know its natural. Her real mother knows how difficult its been for us because Darling Husband insist on making sure she knows exactly what her behavior has directly affected the girls.
Apparently she now wants to play mommy for a while, and we will be left to pick up the pieces…
Sorry for the length, Im just really angry.