Post # 1
Hi Bees! I hope you girls/guys are doing well and hope you can help me out! Background: Iam a 25 year old college student and have always had part time jobs while going to school. Sadly I should have been already graduated at my age but when I started school I was not really interested in it and my grades sufered because of it and because of that Iam still 2 to 3 years from getting my BA. A couple of years ago my outlook on school had changed and currently I’am getting way better grades and doing way better in school. The thing that is concerning to me is that since I have been in school this long my savings from the part time work has really suffered and I feel at this age I should make make more money for myself now by getting a full time job and taking classes at night, just to be able to take care of myself and that will not happen for another few years. The thing that is holding me back is my FI, he has told me plenty of times that getting a full time job will hinder me greatly and that school is more important and that he would be severly dissapointed in me if I was to go this route and that he wants to be able to provide for me so that i would not have to work and to just focus on school but that will not be until a few years as well. So here is my question do I go the full time job route or stay in school and do the part time/schooling for another few years, this has really been heavily on my heart cause I know the pros of going to school and the benefits but getting a job is good too.
Post # 2
If you feel comfortable working full-time and taking night classes, then do it. It will not be easy by any means, but I know several people who have pulled it off. Working part time and doing school part time is always an option, but I completely understand not wanting to get deep into debt. Do what you’re comforable with. Definitely apply for all the grants and scholarships you can. You might be surprised how many you may qualify for.
If your FI will be severely disappointed if you take a full time job, and he wants to support you but won’t be able to for a few years…that’s just confusing to me. Either you would have to keep working part time and possibly go into debt (I don’t know your situation), or you would have to put your education on hold. Surely he doesn’t want that, either?
If you want to work full-time, and take night classes, have a serious discussion with your FI. Tell him you’re willing to work hard and his support would help immensely. It might be rough, but it’s temporary, and life will be easier for the both of you when it’s all over with.
Good luck!! <3
Post # 3
Willow90: Thank you for your response and kind words. Iam comfortable with taking night classes and yes I just need to talk about this seriously with the FI.Thanks for all the advice and I have known a few people who have done this as well and the scholarships are a great idea plus loans :]
Post # 4
If your FI is able to, and willing to support you while you finished it I would do that! Why draw it out and take years longer to finish and get a decent paying job in your chosen carreer? I think it would be more beneficial to get school done and get a good job.
I worked full time and took night classes for 6 years while trying to finish my degree. I was lucky enought to have my then BF (now husband) tell me to just go full time the last year and get it done. He said he would rather me hurry up with school so I can contribute more to our futue faster and we can start saving for a house. We already lived together for 4 years at that point. He financially supported me and I was very grateful, but felt really weird about it too.
I had never been dependant on anyone before, and it felt awful. I felt guilty and worried it would out stress on our relationship. It was so weird having to say things like “i need socks, or a bra” or whatever it is, and almost having to ask perrmission to buy it. I mean, obviously i didnt need permission, but I always felt like I should explain why i was spending his money. It took me a long time to get over the fact that it was not his money, it was now our money Since we had mereged finances.
We eventually figured out it made me feel better to get a copy of his debit card so I could just go get grocerries or buy things when I needed them instead of having to ask for money. You are already engaged anyways, and I can only assume you will merge finances at some point. If this is the case it will be your money, not his and yours. I would take him up on it so you can get school out of the way and make room for new things after (house, kids, vacations, whatever you dream).
Post # 5
What would guarantee you’d get the best grades/best outcome for school? You don’t want to waste the money and spread yourself thin. You know what you’re capable of, so I think maybe writing it down and really thinking critically about where this “extra year” would come from – i.e. take a year of less money to prepare yourself for the best outcome to make more money after school.
The scholarships/grants/loans all of this!! There are so many places to look just googling your interests, or where you live, can come up with many unexpected things.
He sounds very supportive so I am really confident whatever you choose will go well for you. Good luck!
Post # 6
LoveBlossom14: I think you should stay in school full time. The time you will save by finishing school earlier will definitely be rewarded by working in your field quicker. Listen to your fiance.