(Closed) Sticky situation…

posted 10 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2008

Can I ask how old you are? And how far along in wedding planning are you? Like would you be paying out the ass to back out of some things? 

Post # 5
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2008

how much of the wedding would they pay for? like, how much of a budget do you have? because if i were in that situation (i thought i was gonna be) i’d just pay for everything myself and have a real small wedding and live with my fiance because seriously, your parents will feel horrible t hat they put you in this situation later on in life because of what punks they’re being. i’m your age and i’ve been living with my fiance for the past year (exclusively, but on and off for 2 years) and my parents are pleased with the wedding (they are paying) but if it were between doing what i want and having a small wedding and doing what THEY want and having a big wedding, i’d say ef it. because guess what, you’re a grown up now who’s gonna get married and they need to understand that.
plus, if his name is already on the lease, and his stuff is there, is it his house? or do you live there too? and how long have ya’ll been living there? call his bluff, you’ll be happier that way.
good luck! <3

Post # 6
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2008

Agreed. You are an adult. You should not let him have that kind of  hold over you. If I were in that situation, I’d say, "I’m really sorry you feel that way dad. But I am an adult and this is what I’m doing." And pay for the wedding yourselves. (I wonder if you mom would secretly help out, since she doesn’t have a problem with it).

You might have to sacrifice some things, or put the wedding off a bit longer. But it can be done. There are ways to do things cheaply but still nice and chic, you know? And who knows maybe he will eventually come around and help out again. I’m sorry you have to go through this. But if it were me, I would hold my ground on this one. I hope it all works out ok!

Post # 7
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2008

Unless you are going to be relying on your parents for continued financial support after marriage, I wouldn’t let them dictate how you run your relationship with your fiance. Acquiescing to your father’s demands, while immediately satisfying because he would be paying for the wedding that you want, may set a precedence that you may have trouble shaking as you and your fiance start your lives together. You need to be willing to decide what you’re willing to do to get what you want.

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