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Help - Our Officiant was 45 minutes late to the wedding. How to handle?

STOP ASKING...

posted 1 year ago in Waiting
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    UmakeURownLUCK    August 18, 2012   MI

    when I am going to get married, I will punch you!

    MIND YOUR BUSINESS!

    Sorry...had to get that out, this happens, no JOKE, at LEAST 3 times a week.  UGH especially coming from people at work or that I don't know very well...I don't care about your 2 cents.  And my mom can shut up about it too. grr

    ok...done :)

     
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    Gemstone    July 2011   Cincinnati

    I know it's frustrating! I think it's happened to many of us. My FI and I were together for almost 4 years before getting engaged so we got it all the time, too. I'd just smile and say "We'll see" and then enjoy daydreaming about when it would actually happen. :)

     
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    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    Ugh this used to annoy me so much. It only came from peopel I wasn't very close with like work colleagues and acquaintences. Because everyone close to me knew that I was on the edge of my seat waiting for DH to propose!! There really is no good response, even if you produce some kind of actual timeline for the person asking they are never satisfied and usually become argumentative, claiming you should hurry up and do it sooner. Thanks. Like I didn't think of that!

     
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    pasquel    July 30, 2011   Boston

    I have been getting this question for a while now...my answer is we are going pass on the whole marriage thing and just live in sin or he would be really made if I got engaged now considering he is deployed.  

     
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    artichokey    June 16, 2012  

    Oh girl, I feel you. I will never forget the first time I was asked that question. I was 12 and a pastor thought I was 19 and was asking when I was going to get married. I have never, ever looked older than I am. I'm 27 and the other day I was carded at the mall. The MALL! You know, because you have to be over 16 to be there alone on weekends? Yeah. 27. Thanks dude. Anyway, now that SO and I have been together for almost 4 years it's inevitable. Everyone else is married, I'm creeping towards 30 and we've been living together for 3 years. They ask and I pretty much always say, "I dunno, you'd have to ask him." I think what makes me the most annoyed is that they ask me and it makes me wonder, and then I get angry at SO for not having done it yet! Just let me be and I won't think about it, jerk-faces.

     
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    BayStateBride    September 1, 2012   Cow Hampshire (wedding in MA)

    @artichokey: I'm 27 and the other day I was carded at the mall. The MALL! You know, because you have to be over 16 to be there alone on weekends? Yeah. 27. Thanks dude.

    LOL that's funny.  I was reaching for a free sample (some chicken thing) at Costco and the lady goes "little girl, go ask your mother if you can have this."  I was 22 at the time.  >_<  I pulled out my license to prove it.

     
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    sturpherz    March 21, 2012  

    I feel your pain!! I get that all the time, from everyone!! It does not matter if I know you or not... lol  Its super annoying!! All I want to say, I dont know, but thank you for rubbing it in!

     
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    Tree3910    June 25, 2011   Cleveland, OH

    After you get married the next thing is... When are you going to have babies?

     
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    picturemeurs    February 2012  

    @Tree3910: And after the baby the next one when are you gonna have some more?

     
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    Scottielass    July 3, 2011   Westerville, OH

    Thank god our families just gave up on us after 4 years (with wedding and babies).  We'll have been together almost 7 years by our wedding day.  The engagement was actually a pleasant surprise to everyone because it took so long (for them, not for us).

     
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    mjchexum    October 20, 2012   saint louis, mo

    agreed. we have a "potential" date set, but until we can start saving some money, and some other things fall into place, I do not want to set a permanent date because I'm not sure if it will happen then. So yes, please, stop asking. Don't worry...I'll let you know when it's happening! I won't forget to tell you or anything! ahhh!!

     
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    CapeBoundBride    June 3, 2011   MD/VA -legally wed 4/22/11

    @artichokey: "I think what makes me the most annoyed is that they ask me and it makes me wonder, and then I get angry at SO for not having done it yet!"

    Ha ha, I've done this too. I end up avoiding people all together just so I don't hear this question anymore. Why do they always ask me, and not him? They even direct the question at me when we're both in the same room. You have to wonder if sometimes people are trying to start a fight.

     
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    DreamingBee    October 2012  

     @Tree3910:, @picturemeurs:

    That's right! It never ends.  When are you getting engaged/married/babies/more babies/buying ahouse/retiring/have grandchildren?

    Sheesh. Yup, we do just have to get used to people asking annoying questions.

     
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    aberry    August 20, 2011  

    I've just started replying with, "TOMORROW!" because otherwise I get a really annoyed look on my face and the, "Your guess is as good as mine!" answer threatens to fly out of my mouth. As if their lives will be any more fulfilled, because it seems like half the time the people who bug you the most are the people who just like to hear themselves talk and be the obnoxious one at a party. I can't tell you how many times we heard, "YOU GUYS ARE NEXT!" at the wedding he was in last weekend. Growl.

     
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    CupcakeLove       Melbourne, Australia

    haha I HATE this question! I recently absolutely cracked it because my boyfriend said that he never gets asked! I said thats because they ALL ask me!! I get asked by everyone at work, by my friends, his friends, our families... it never ends! I wish they would all start asking him so he would realise just how often people ask!

    There is no good response to it... I have tried everything but it doesnt stop people asking the next time they see us!

     
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    marietaylor    June 4, 2013  

    OMG I can totally relate. Sometimes I dont think people mean too much harm by it, but its super annoying when you are catching it from all angles i.e. family and friends. friends i tell to shut the hell up lol but they know me well :) his family i try to polite lol

     
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    UmakeURownLUCK    August 18, 2012   MI

    What is the worst is when they start giving their opinions and "advice" on it...."oh you've been together THAT long"..."wow it makes it seem like hes not sure about you huh?"....etc, etc, ETC

    Keep your "advice" to yourself PLEASE

    My boyfriend never gets asked either, yet I still hear it almost everyday! 

     
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    TinyTina    June 2012   Albany, NY

    UGH! Hate this question.

    The first time my mom asked me I didn't know how to respond so I just said "I don't know". Cue the flip out... "what do you mean you don't know, you've been together for 5 years and you don't know?!" on and on and on.

    Now I just tell people we've decided that we don't want to get married. Usually gets them to leave me alone. :)

     
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    MeganStewart    November 25, 2011  

    I have been dating my BF for over three and a half years.  We live in a small town that we are both from.  He is 5 years older, so everyone assumes that his clock is ticking and that we should have been married 3 years ago!  Well, life happens, jobs change or are lost, student loans, etc that add to the factors as to why we aren't paying for a wedding at this point.  At two years, we went to a New Year's party where we all made predictions.  About 7 people predicted that we would be engaged and or married in 2009.  Well, I lost my job due to natural disaster, moved away for further schooling, and he changed jobs and was starting fresh on a new career...that is all okay to do in modern relationships!!  Well, when I was back visiting for a hometown football game that fall, the lady whose house we were at that New Year's Eve was telling me that their prediction for having a third child (she got married at 20 and uber conservative, thinks that having a career outside of the home is not doing a woman's work in the eye's of God) came true, but why not mine?  What was WRONG with him and us for not being engaged yet?  Maybe he isn't a "man of god" and you should just leave him?!?!?!  

    Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?  I couldn't believe that anyone would have the nerve to say that to me and ask what was wrong with him?  

    You are preaching to the choir, sister!  I know your frustration all to intimately.  

    Good news...we are ring shopping and we do plan on trying to get pregnant not long after the wedding, so I won't mind the baby question.  I mean, he is getting older...;)

     

     
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    MissBuffalo    November 2011  

    I was wondering about this question and a funny way to answer it. Generally I can only think of sarcastic replies to this question, but I don't want to be mean to other people or imply that he's SLOW (which he is).

     
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    Tree3910    June 25, 2011   Cleveland, OH

    A lot of the people that ask are work people and they aren't coming to the wedding anyway so just stop asking. I get it people are trying to be nice, but like the day after I got engaged people were asking me all the time. Come on, it takes more than 24 hours to plan a freakin wedding!

     
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    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    @MeganStewart:As crazy as that lady sounds I can actually kind of see her argument from a conservative/christian point of view. Back in the day, especially before birth control it was the man's 'duty' to propose to us and do it fast. Now they can wait as long as they want and be really choosy about who they end up with. But regardless it's rude to give someone advice like that unsolicited. I am sooo careful now about not even bringing up the subject around couples who aren't engaged!!

     

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