Post # 1
Hey everyone! So I am going for my first dress fitting this week, and my dress is a strapless, sweetheart neckline with ruching, and the bottom is feathery-looking and a ballgown. I am also adding a very blingy sash to the middle and ditching the flower (my dress is the Mori Lee Blu 48106). I found this photo (it’s not me) but this is my exact dress with a very similar sash.
So here is my dilemma: My Future Mother-In-Law would like me to wear her deceased mother’s vintage crystal earrings and necklace. I wish I had a photo, but I don’t. FMIL only has 2 sons, no daughters, and I am marrying her baby and this will be the last wedding for her. The necklace is a very neck-hugging length (not a choker), and the earrings are like chandelier looking. I do think the necklace and earrings are absolutely stunning, and I would love to wear them with on my wedding day, as I think it was a very nice gesture on FMIL’s part to offer them to me and would make her very happy. However, I am not totally convinced that necklaces look great with strapless gowns. Also, I am terrified that my own mother will be hurt if I wear such a personal piece of the groom’s side family heirloom, and not something from her. I will be wearing a right-hand diamond ring my mother got me for my college graduation a few years ago, and she is making my brooch bouquet that has many of mine, hers, her mothers, and her mother’s and father’s mothers brooches and jewelry incorporated into it, but I feel like that will be kind of un-noticed compared this super fancy crystal necklace. I just don’t know what to do yet, but I should probably figure it out soon because I am less than 2 months away! I just don’t want to hurt my mother’s feelings, but also don’t want to hurt his mother’s feelings. Ahhh!
Anyways, if you got married in a strapless gown, I would love to see your photos, necklace or sans-necklace! That way, I can attempt to base more of my decision on whether I like the ~look~ of a necklace with a strapless gown, because I have a feeling either way, someone’s feelings are going to be hurt 🙁 Thank you all!!!
Post # 3
I think it largely depends on whether or not the necklace takes away or adds to the dress.
Some really blingy dresses don’t need much sparkle in the form of jewelry. Whereas, if you have a plain satin dress, a sparkly sash or jewelry can dress it up a bit. In my own opinion, your dress can go either way.
Do you have a picture you could put up of the necklace so we could get a better idea of what it will look like with the dress?
Post # 4
Personally, I would prefer a necklace.
Post # 5
From how you described it, I think that will look great. I went to a ball in a dress with an almost identical silhouette and neckline (rouched the same too) and an almost-choker length vintage crystal necklace, I think it made a good pairing. All you can really do though is try them on together. If the necklace doesn’t work out, you could definately at least wear the earrings.
Post # 6
I have a strapless dress with a sweetheart neckline, and I’m wearing a double-strand pearl necklace. I love the look of strapless dresses with necklaces– it draws the attention up to your face.
Post # 7
Personally, I don’t like the necklace look with strapless gowns. But I’m a less is more kinda person. Apart from my rings, the only jewelry I wore on our wedding day were diamond/sapphire stud earrings.
Post # 8
I think it depends on the other jewels you plan to wear. If you’ll be wearing big, dangly earrings and a blinged out bracelet, a necklace might be too much. You should ask your Future Mother-In-Law if you could try them on with your gown in order to make a decision.
P.S. Don’t let anyone pressure you. Do what YOU want!
Post # 9
The necklace looks a lot like this. I am just worried about having too much going on between my brooch bouquet (blingy), my sash (blingy) and the necklace, plus I think I care more about my mom’s feelings than my FMIL’s, but now I feel like I have to wear the crystal necklace from Future Mother-In-Law, or wear no necklace at all. My mom is going with me to my dress fitting, I will probably get the necklace from Future Mother-In-Law and take it with me, that way I can see how my mom reacts to it. She is terrible at hiding her feelings, so I should be able to pick up on if she is hurt by it. Ha…I will post pics after, but in the mean time, I would love to see anyone’s photos of their strapless gowns!!!
Post # 10
I love strapless dresses with necklaces as long as the necklace doesn’t detract from the dress or compete too much with the sash. I also added a blingy sash to my strapless gown, and I found that the necklace was too much with my sash, so I’m going with earrings and no necklace (I think). Your gown is beautiful, and if the jewelry goes with it and does not detract, I say go for it. That is very sweet of your Future Mother-In-Law….but only wear it if it’s what you want and you like it!
Post # 11
I think it depends on if the necklace “works” with the dress. For yours, I wouldn’t want one that is too dainty but a too thick/chunky one might compete with the dress. I think for that dress, there’s definitely a happy medium and I’ve worn necklaces with strapless dresses before. It would also depend on if you are wearing your hair up or down. I’m wearing my hair down and between that and the dress, it was just too much going on in the bust/neckline area. I also have a brooch + real flowers bouquet.
Post # 12
I tend to think that chandelier earrings with a busy necklace can be too much, especially if you have a blingy belt. I would vote for just wearing the earrings and then maybe a bracelet from your mom’s side if there is one? It sounds like you are incorporating a lot of your mom’s touches already though, so I wouldn’t feel guilty. Your dress is beautiful!
Post # 13
I prefer no necklace since it creates a nicer, longer neckline. Instead, I am going for an elegant pair of drop earrings!
Post # 14
I am also wearing a strapless gown with a sparkly belt/sash. I personally thought that a large necklace and earings AND belt looked a bit much (for me) when I was trying on accessories. I don’t think you are obligated to wear both of your FMIL’s family pieces. I think that by choosing one or the other, you are still honoring her family and yet not overdooing it as to offend your mother/family.
Post # 15
Because of the sash, I would definitely not wear a necklace. I’d go with just the earrings.
Post # 16
Now that I’ve seen something similar to what your Future Mother-In-Law is offering, I would pass on the necklace. It competes too much with the neckline and the sash. You could compromise and just wear the earrings and maybe your Mom could buy you a necklace to wear on your special day.