Stressed bride receiving no empathy

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
2418 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

pugmomma:  I’m sorry you’re dealing with this, that’s incredibly frustrating.  I think it could be one of two things.  Either your family is projecting the bridezilla stereotype on you, assuming that any opinion you voice is domineering, or if could be that you’re genuinely showing how stressed you are and they’re responding to that.  Either way their response is totally sexist – have you ever seen someone tell a man to relax?  The words “calm down honey” make me want to stab…

I think you might have too many cooks in the kitchen.  Why his brother’s opinion about lighting color is relevant is beyond me.  If the parents are paying and want to control the engagement party, I vote go ahead and let them.  It’s not the actual wedding, if they throw a party you don’t really like it’s just one day.  And if you guys are throwing the party without financial help, stop talking about this with the parents.  It sounds like they’re not making the process any easier so no need to involve them.  Good luck!!

Post # 3
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

I have to say– take this party as a lesson and DO NOT let all these people become involved in the actual wedding. In fact, I agree with the PP: let them “have” this party. Seriously, who cares about the color scheme for an engagement party? Let them plan it however the heck they want. Then go on and plan the WEDDING you want.

Post # 4
Member
1500 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Have the party, but don’t tell anyone about the details. I kept most things about my weddings (I had TWO parties!) under wraps. This way, no one can really have an opinion, and I dont’ have to defend each decision I make.

Post # 5
Member
716 posts
Busy bee

Who is hosting the engagement party?  That person sets the plan.  The End.

Also, honestly, lights and DIY elements are very minor details that are probably only important to you as the bride.  As a guest (which included your family), no one cares about your lights, flowers, or  decorations.  People care about is when and where convenient and hospitable.  Maybe try toning down the wedding talk with the family members who don’t seem too interested.

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