Stressful Bridal Shower Situation

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
1750 posts
Buzzing bee

Why don’t they like her? Are they holding a grudge against her mother and taking it out on her as well?

They can’t forbid you to go to her events. If you want to go to your niece’s bridal shower, you can.

Choosing to go may change the relationship between you and your family, but you’ll have to make the decision about what is more important — your niece, or your BIL and SIL’s grudge.

Post # 4
Member
42538 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would go to the shower hosted by ther mother and I would host a shower for her myself. How are they going to stop you?

This man had been divorced and remarried x 25 years. Time to get over it!

Post # 5
Member
1750 posts
Buzzing bee

I wouldn’t want to be close to people who would do what you say your BIL and his wife have done. Their refusal to talk to you may be a blessing in disguise. 

I’m sorry they’ve made your and your husband’s life difficult. That’s just not right.

Post # 6
Member
1108 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I’m going to guess you told BIL’s current wife that you were on the WB in the first place?  Otherwise, how would she have known to poke around here looking for info?  

As for forbidding you to go to the shower and/or host one yourself, what are they going to do if you go against them?  Not speak to you?  Sounds like that might not be a bad thing. 

Obviously, this BIL doesn’t care enough about his child’s happiness.  That’s sad.

Post # 8
Member
7216 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

MistyBee:  This is why Wedding bee needs to change policy and allow people to delete posts. It is internet best practice these days to allow people to wipe their history. I’ve no idea why Weddingbee is so behind the times in this regards. You’re not the only person to have a problem with this.

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. I suggest you keep a low profile for now.

Post # 10
Member
5228 posts
Bee Keeper

julies1949:  +100

MistyBee:  I agree with what julies1949 said. Throw a shower for her yourself. I’d also tell BIL and the second wife to grow up.

Post # 12
Member
5228 posts
Bee Keeper

MistyBee:  Don’t go then, but throw one for her yourself.

Post # 13
Member
1890 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

MistyBee:  I am concerned that your husband is allowing his family to treat you as the outcast. These people already treat you like crap and are now threatening to treat him the same way if you don’t do what they say, and this is ok with him? This is emotional terrorism and they don’t deserve to have this kind of power in your life. Have the relationship you want to have with this girl. I know it’s tough but you can’t allow them to bully your family your entire life. 

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