Suggestions for including FI's family in ceremony

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

KatJoy227:  I’m having my niece (she’ll be 13 at the wedding) as a junior bridesmaid, I’m having my two nephews & future brother in law (15, 13, & 10) as ushers & they’ll also escort our moms to their seats. I’m having my fiance’s niece & my future sister-in-law plus a close family friend (2,9,&4) as flower girls. Maybe do some kind of unity ceremony as a family?

Post # 4
7025 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

My feeling is: although it’s very thoughtful of you to want to include his cousins, you can’t include everyone. (By my count there are 12 different girls you’ve mentioned). I think it is ok to just have the cousins as guests and in the family photos. Also your two friends (the ones who are also MOH’s friends) – they can be involved in other things (bachelorette party, some special photos) without the need to have them in the bridal party.

EDIT: If you’ve already got your 2 daughters as flower girls, it’s probably not necessary to fit your nieces in either, if you think the bridal party is getting too big. It’s obviously ok to give preference to your own daughters!

Post # 5
3697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

You can do readings even though you aren’t getting married in a church. So some of them can do readings 🙂

Post # 6
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Maybe have some of them as ushers? Here it is common if you have a larger family than bridal party to have them act as ushers. And then they also get a corsage/bouteneire too.

Post # 7
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

KatJoy227:  You could do a reading that’s non-religious.  Check out for some ideas.  I’ve been to weddings where “readings” are song lyrics, poems, quotes from movies…. Our wedding is non-religious and we are doing a Tying of the Knot style cermony- family members are all helping- some phsically tying the ropes around our hands, others reading. 

You could also have them pass out programs, favors, manage the guest book or any other ‘in need of minor supervision’ tasks (my friend did a polaroid book in addition to guest book, so her cousin took the pix).  If not part of the ceremony, they could help during reception.

At the same time, I agree with PP that you don’t necessarily need to have them.  At some point you realize that there are just too many involved.  If you didn’t have your shower yet, ask whoever is planning it to perhaps include them ( the girls at least ) then? They will feel super special knowing they were chosen to help-run gifts, or pass out a fun drink or favor to all the ladies. 

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