Post # 1
Soooo about eight months ago we decided to have a destination wedding and my FIL was asked to be the best man and he agreed….we offered to pay for the trip for him. He then changed his mind and we stillbdon’t knowthe actual reason becaude we have heard different things but after spending money on save the dates, catering etc we decided to move forth and now my FI best friend is his best man. Suddenly this week my FI mother calls and questions why we are getting married elsewhere and shes been aware of our decision from the start and was supposed to attend. We talked with them before evn making the decision. She then goes on to say they wouldve paid for it hadbit been here.. I am confused….anyone else have issues like this? I thought a low key wedding would be drama free. And its six months away
Post # 3
- Wedding: October 2014 - Disney
@SunshineInMyFuture: No wedding is drama free. I think destination weddings are only drama free when you 100% know that your family cant foot the bill, and you know a real wedding will ensue nothing but drama. We’ve had minor drama in our families over our decision but when I explained costs, my wants for a house, this is about a family not a couple since I have my daughter, and that I dont want stress on our day people back off.
Post # 4
I know it is upsetting when things like this happen but I think when you choose a DW you have to be prepared for others to disagree and not want to come. It sucks but it is just something you have to accept.
As adults we all make decisions on our lives- whether it be to have a DW or to attend a DW. And we have to live with those decisions.
Try not to analyse it too much. Just because FMIL & FFIL don’t attend the actually wedding ceremony does not necessarily mean that they don;t love and support you guys.
Post # 5
Thanks ladies. I think my big thing is they have been involved from the very beginning and her questioning was out of the blue. my FI feelings were hurt because we explained from the start our decision….I dont have parents to help pay etc and we are footing the bill on our own. We graduated from college three years ago and dont have a lot of money for a wedding. My FI has a HUGE family. We are having a celebration when we get back. His siblings are coming and a few of our friends so its not about them not attending..its more so that this questioning of our decision is literallybout of no where and she is asking us to now change our plans.
Post # 6
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
Weddings unfortunately are never drama-free. My friends who’ve had DW were more stressed because everyone got mad at them for having to spend so much money, time, and vacation days to go.
Post # 7
if you want a drama free wedding you may as well elope