- 8 years ago
- Wedding: November 2010
Fiance and I had a big argument last night. We were out for dinner, so it was one of those arguments where you can’t raise your voice or make too much of a scene… which, I think, makes it worse because I’d rather scream and wave my arms around and throw a hissy fit so I can get. it. all. out.
Back story- we are paying for the majority of the wedding ourselves… like, 4/5 of the budget. Unfortunately, we have had to put some of the costs on a credit card (like the honeymoon and rehearsal dinner) because we just don’t have the cash to front it at the moment. We’re not having some big extravagant thing… but the costs just add up. One thing I’ve been pretty adamant on is having open bar for the cocktail hour. Not the whole night… but just for that hour while we have pictures taken. Unfortunately, our venue’s open bar costs are by consumption, so we can either throw a certain amount in to the bar, or deal with the bill (whatever it may be) after. Fiance doesn’t see why we need to do this… thinks its stupid. Why do we need to pay for their drinks… blah, blah.
YET, then he’s planning on a bachelor party in Vegas! Which would be fine with me, if his friends were paying his way. But they’re not. So he would have to pay for air fare (at least $400) and hotel, and spending money.
So I. Had. A. Tantrum. Bridezilla me if you must, but it’s INSANE that we can’t even afford our wedding in cash… nor put enough money toward the open bar as I would like… but then he thinks its okay to go spend $600+ dollars on some bachelor weekend across the country? Somehow, he didn’t see my point. He said, “It doesn’t matter what I spend on my bachelor party… we still don’t have the money to fund the open bar.” I said, “Are you kidding me? That’s SIX HUNDRED dollars we could PUT TOWARD THE BAR!” I didn’t yell (too loudly) or cause too much of a scene… but there were threats that I was going to walk out on him and leave him in the restaurant by himself… and I most definitely started crying at the table (always embarrassing.
I left to go to the bathroom to compose myself, and he must have taken that time to text his best man to tell him about my fit. His best man agreed with me, and said that maybe they should just drive down to the local casino (Foxwoods… only about 2 hours away)… that way it’d be cheaper (yes), easier to plan (yes), more of his friends could afford to come (yes), and we would have some extra money to put toward the bar (hopefully).
Anyway, I just needed to vent it out here. This was the first major wedding planning fight we had, and I’m sure there will be more to come. I’m glad we were able to come up with a compromise.
Anyone else able to relate? Has the wedding stress come between you and your FI?